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The world is experiencing a dramatic increase in population. This is causing problems not only for the poor in undeveloped countries but also for industrialised and developing nations. Describe some of the problems that overpopulation causes, and suggest at least one possible solution. v.2

The world is experiencing a dramatic increase in population. This is causing problems not only for the poor in undeveloped countries but also for industrialised and developing nations. Describe some of the problems that overpopulation causes, and suggest at least one possible solution. v. 2
Our world is experimenting massive increase in population and thereby not only well-developed countries suffer from this overpopulation. Despite governments are trying to solve this issue, population increases year by year. This causes huge problems in all of the countries like scarcity of foods, unemployment, crowded cities, increased crime and so on. Educating people would be the best possible solution to tackle this problem. The most common problem of overpopulation is that people cannot find jobs. Thereby, people cannot get the opportunity to work, because that country is overflooded with population and there is the scarcity of employment. And, also, crowded cities are not attractive and there persists a lot of noise that is very annoying. For this reason, this may lead to depression in the tourism of cities. Also, increasing in the population is inversely proportional to the development level of the country. And this might have enormous effects on government politically. The food crisis, growth in crime rates, noise and air pollution, housing problem all emerge only because of the increased population. In spite of these issues, governments have solutions to cope. Even, there are some regulations that are dedicated to solve this problem. For instance, overpopulated countries have such legislation which prohibits 2 and more children per family. Educating people and building an educated nation is the only solution to this heinous problem. Until the citizens become educated and understand the effects of having more family members in their family and in the country, other measures that the government take would be valueless. In conclusion, the countries who are suffering from this problem should take proper initiative and measurement for solutions to fight against it. And politics and the government have vital roles to play on this occasion along with the awareness among the citizens.
Our world is experimenting massive increase in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
and thereby not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
well-developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
suffer from this overpopulation. Despite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
are trying to solve this issue,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
increases year by year. This causes huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
in
Consider using "all the".
all of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
like scarcity of foods, unemployment, crowded cities, increased crime and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. Educating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would be the best possible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solution
to tackle this problem.

The most common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
of overpopulation is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
cannot find jobs. Thereby,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the opportunity to work,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
is
Possible spelling mistake found.
overflooded
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
and there is the scarcity of employment. And,
also
, crowded cities are not attractive and there persists
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
noise
that is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
annoying.
For this reason
, this may lead to depression in the tourism of cities.
Also
, increasing in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
is
inversely
proportional to the development level of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. And this might have enormous effects on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
politically
. The food crisis, growth in crime rates, noise and air pollution, housing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
all emerge
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the increased population.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
In spite of
these issues,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solutions
to cope. Even, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
regulations that
are dedicated
to solve this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
.
For instance
, overpopulated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have such legislation which prohibits 2 and more children per family. Educating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and building an educated nation is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solution
to this heinous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
. Until the citizens become educated and understand the effects of having more family members in their family and in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, other measures that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
take would be valueless.

In conclusion
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
who are suffering from this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
should take proper initiative and measurement for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solutions
to fight against it. And politics and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
have vital roles to play on this occasion along with the awareness among the citizens.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
30Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay The world is experiencing a dramatic increase in population. This is causing problems not only for the poor in undeveloped countries but also for industrialised and developing nations. Describe some of the problems that overpopulation causes, and suggest at least one possible solution. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
298 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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