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The tendency of news reporters in the media to focus more on problems and emergencies than on positive developments is harmful to the individuals and the society as a whole. To what extend do you agree or disagree? v.1

The tendency of news reporters in the media to focus more on problems and emergencies than on positive developments is harmful to the individuals and the society as a whole. v. 1
Correspondents, at present, tend to demonstrate the current issues and political upheavals to the public rather than positive advancements in the area, which is deleterious for the people and communities as well. I, partially, second with this viewpoint because media channels focus on both sides which bring a positive impact to individuals as well as the community. To begin with, all TV channels, YouTube, and other social media endeavour to highlight the present problems as the downfall of a political party, murder, diplomatic thoughts of developed countries et Cetra. This is because news reporters and media channels want to become famous by any means, since they know people love to watch serious and interesting facts, for example, which politicians make a Himalayan blunder that causes a doom to the terrain. All these occurrences have a great appeal to the population of any society. The reason is that after concerning all that news, the public does not want to make mistakes in voting the accurate political party. Thus, not only the news reporter, but also individuals shows their interest in severe incidents. On the contrary, it is unjustifiable to say that the media is indifferent to make videos about the development of a society. To illustrate, there are lots of positive progressions broadcasted in the USA in recent times, which have been telecasted in the BBC, and CNN, which consider as renowned channels. It focuses on recent discoveries, and how a developing country has developed by its industrious attitude towards work. If the public observes it, they will be able to understand which sectors, governments should focus. By doing this, the public and nations will achieve success so that correspondents elucidate in their channels all these positive aspects as well. In conclusion, different types of news broadcasters release serious events of the community, which brings a detrimental effect on human lives, while they do not show a positive progression of the country. I, partially, agree with the statement, because they highlight on both sides to bring positive advancements of the society.
Correspondents, at present, tend to demonstrate the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
issues and political upheavals to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
advancements in the area, which is deleterious for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and communities
as well
. I,
partially
, second with this viewpoint
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
channels
focus on both sides which bring a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
impact to individuals
Probable usage error. Use "and" after 'both'.
as well as
the community.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, all TV
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
channels
, YouTube, and other social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
Possible spelling mistake. 'endeavour' is British English.
endeavour
to highlight the present problems as the downfall of a political party, murder, diplomatic thoughts of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
Possible spelling mistake found.
et
Possible spelling mistake found.
Cetra
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
reporters and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
channels
want to become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
by any means, since they know
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
serious and interesting facts,
for example
, which politicians
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a Himalayan blunder that causes a doom to the terrain. All these occurrences have a great appeal to the population of any society. The reason is that after concerning all that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
does not want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
mistakes in voting the accurate political party.
Thus
, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
reporter,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
their interest in severe incidents.

On the contrary
, it is unjustifiable to say that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
is indifferent to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
videos about the development of a society. To illustrate, there are lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
progressions broadcasted in the USA in recent times, which have been
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "telecast", the past tense form of the verb 'telecast'?
telecasted
in the BBC, and CNN, which consider as renowned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
channels
. It focuses on recent discoveries, and how a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing country
has developed by its industrious attitude towards work. If the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
observes it, they will be able to understand which sectors,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should focus. By doing this, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
and nations will achieve success
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that correspondents elucidate in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
channels
all these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
aspects
as well
.

In conclusion
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
broadcasters release serious
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
of the community, which brings a detrimental effect on human
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
, while they do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
progression of the country. I,
partially
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the statement,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they highlight on both sides to bring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
positive
advancements of the society.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay The tendency of news reporters in the media to focus more on problems and emergencies than on positive developments is harmful to the individuals and the society as a whole. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
340 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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