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the pie charts shows the amount of money that a children's charity located in the USA spent and reveived in one year. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words v.1

the pie charts shows the amount of money that a children's charity located in the USA spent and reveived in one year.
It is argued that refugees should be provided with basic aid such as food and shelter by wealthy nations. This essay completely agrees with this view / argument because it is a moral obligation and the rich countries can easily afford the expenses. The primary reason why developed countries should welcome fugitives is that it is unfair not to render support to them. That is to say, it is important to help each other during tough times. Innocent people should not be left in such horrible conditions to face death and misery while they are uncertain about the status of their living. For example, countries like the USA and Germany have become home for approximately 5 million Syrian refugees and take care of their basic needs. Another reason is that wealthy nations are stable enough to economically help people fleeing from their war torn countries. In other words, accepting more people and providing them with food and shelter will not cause strain on the public coffers. In fact, the economy might benefit if the country can provide employment for the refugees who can strengthen the labour force. For instance, according to an article published by The Times, only 3% of Germany’s economy was utilized to meet the needs of Syrian asylum seekers and also 70% of them are placed in various sectors such as industries and construction companies. In conclusion, rich nations should not hold themselves back from providing basic aid to the refugees because it a humanitarian obligation and it does not cause any harm to the economy of their nation.
It
is argued
that
refugees
should
be provided
with basic aid such as food and shelter by wealthy
nations
. This essay completely
agrees
with this view / argument
because
it is a moral obligation and the rich
countries
can
easily
afford the expenses.

The primary reason why developed
countries
should welcome fugitives is that it is unfair not to render support to them.
That is
to say, it is
important
to
help
each other during tough times. Innocent
people
should not be
left
in such horrible conditions to face death and misery while they are uncertain about the status of their living.
For example
,
countries
like the USA and Germany have become home for approximately 5 million Syrian
refugees
and take care of their basic needs.

Another reason is that wealthy
nations
are stable
enough
to
economically
help
people
fleeing from their war torn
countries
.
In other words
, accepting more
people
and providing them with food and shelter will not cause strain on the public coffers.

In fact, the economy might benefit if the
country
can provide employment for the
refugees
who can strengthen the
labour
force.
For instance
, according to an article published by The Times,
only
3% of Germany’s economy
was utilized
to
meet
the needs of Syrian asylum seekers and
also
70% of them
are placed
in various sectors such as industries and construction
companies
.

In conclusion
, rich
nations
should not hold themselves back from providing basic aid to the
refugees
because
it
a humanitarian obligation and it does not cause any harm to the economy of their
nation
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay the pie charts shows the amount of money that a children's charity located in the USA spent and reveived in one year.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
262 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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