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The number of cars has increased significantly in major cities. What problems does this cause and what are some solutions to these problems? v.1

The number of cars has increased significantly in major cities. What problems does this cause and what are some solutions to these problems? v. 1
It has been observed that there is a sudden rise in the number of private motor vehicles in metro cities. Although, more cars in the town would lead to severe congestion, however, government can combat this by motivating people to opt for public transport. To begin with, a rapid increase in automobiles in the major cities would certainly lead to traffic jams. This is because more number of vehicles would use the existing roads and motorways to commute for numerous reasons such as work and shopping. Since roads and highways could only handle a certain number of vehicles, a steep surge in numbers would be beyond their capacity which results in traffic blockage. For example, as per the study conducted by Times, there is a 20% upsurge in the number of people who opted for private vehicles for regular travel in 2018 over last year leads to traffic in peak hours. On the other hand, National authorities can eradicate this concern by encouraging people to pick up public transport. This means the Government can offer discounted rates to entice people to share the benefits of public transport to travelers. Since more people will be encouraged to opt for public transport over driving a motor car would lead to curb the congestion problem. For example, The Government of Delhi had run a program that offered subsidized price for daily commuters in the year 2016. To conclude, although a surge in many cars would lead to traffic problems because more vehicles would use the existing infrastructure. To tackle this issue, National bodies can offer subsidized fares to motivate people to join public transport.
It has
been observed
that there is a sudden rise in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of private motor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
in metro cities. Although, more cars in the town would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to severe congestion,
however
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
can combat this by motivating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to opt for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
transport.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, a rapid increase in automobiles in the major cities would
certainly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
jams. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the existing roads and motorways to commute for numerous reasons such as work and shopping. Since roads and highways could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
handle a certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
, a steep surge in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
numbers
would be beyond their capacity which results in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
blockage.
For example
, as per the study conducted by Times, there is a 20% upsurge in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who opted for private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
for regular travel in 2018 over last year leads to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
in peak hours.

On the other hand
, National authorities can eradicate this concern by encouraging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to pick up
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
. This means the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
can offer discounted rates to entice
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to share the benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
to travelers. Since more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
be encouraged
to opt for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
over driving a motor car would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to curb the congestion problem.
For example
, The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
of Delhi had run a program that offered subsidized price for daily commuters in the year 2016.

To conclude
, although a surge in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
cars would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
problems
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the existing infrastructure. To tackle this issue, National bodies can offer subsidized fares to motivate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
33Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
The limits of my language are the limits of my world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay The number of cars has increased significantly in major cities. What problems does this cause and what are some solutions to these problems? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
271 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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