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The natural resources such as oil and freshwater are being consumed at alarming rate What problems it can cause How can we solve this problem v.1

The natural resources such as oil and freshwater are being consumed at alarming rate What problems it can cause How can we solve this problem v. 1
It is argued by some that the introduction of new laws is the only way to get home waste recycled properly. However, I believe that apart from laws, education should also be highlighted in terms of address the issue. Therefore, I cannot completely agree with this opinion. Introducing stricter laws and policies by governments may contribute to deal with the inappropriately recycling of domestic rubbish. This is simply because those laws and policies force every household to follow the rules that help to reduce the amount of rubbish caused by them or dispose properly. For example, the recycling rates of domestic rubbish have increased dramatically in many cities after local governments promote the refuse classification and inform corresponding punishment procedures if an individual break the law. In case of being fined, people are willing to try their best to recycle waste properly. However, I always believe that other methods, such as education, are also effective to help increase recycling, instead of only guiding by the legal documents. If Individuals are informed about the damage to the environment due to disposal of their waste, they would understand the importance of recycling. Even though people who break the law will be punished, they still do know what can they do improve without education. In addition, the goal of increasing recycling can only be achieved by participation of everyone, which also relies on good education. To conclude, I concede that stricter policies and laws may be useful to remind people to recycle. Nevertheless, I am convinced that educating people the importance of doing that and what can they do to recycle their waste should not be ignored.
It
is argued
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
that the introduction of new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
home
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
recycled
properly
.
However
, I believe that apart from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
, education should
also
be highlighted
in terms of address the issue.
Therefore
, I cannot completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this opinion.

Introducing stricter
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
and policies by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
may contribute to deal with the
inappropriately
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
of domestic rubbish. This is
simply
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
and policies force every household to follow the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the amount of rubbish caused by them or dispose
properly
.
For example
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
rates of domestic rubbish have increased
dramatically
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
cities after local
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
promote the refuse classification and inform corresponding punishment procedures if an individual break the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
. In case of
being fined
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are willing to try their best to recycle
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
properly
.

However
, I always believe that other methods, such as education, are
also
effective to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
increase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
,
instead
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
guiding by the legal documents. If Individuals
are informed
about the damage to the environment due to disposal of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
, they would understand the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
.
Even though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who break the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
will
be punished
, they
still
do know what can they do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
without education.
In addition
, the goal of increasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be achieved
by participation of everyone, which
also
relies on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
education.

To conclude
, I concede that stricter policies and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
laws
may be useful to remind
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to recycle.
Nevertheless
, I
am convinced
that educating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
the importance of doing that and what can they do to recycle their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
should not be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay The natural resources such as oil and freshwater are being consumed at alarming rate What problems it can cause How can we solve this problem v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
274 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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