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The man expresses his opinion about the proposal in the student's letter. Briefly summarize the proposal. Then state the man's opinion about the proposal and explain the reasons he gives for holding that opinion. v.1

The man expresses his opinion about the proposal in the student's letter. Briefly summarize the proposal. Then state the man's opinion about the proposal and explain the reasons he gives for holding that opinion. v. 1
Some people deem that it is good for a boy and a girl if they study in the separate school. However, others think that it is quite beneficial when both genders are studying in co-education. I will discuss both perceptive my crumb of writing before making a final note. There are certain reasons behind there. Firstly, if both genders are a study in different school there are no hesitating during the study. For example, they focus on their studies and achieved their goals very well. However, in a single school student have opportunities to choose our favourite subject. For instance, if boys have chosen business subject, they focus on that subject and become a good businessman in their lifeblood. So, that type of school, pupils concentrates their studies and avoid the bad behaviour. On the other hand, if both genders, they leant in co-education, they learn to respect each other and find the solution easily related to their study. Furthermore, if both gender studies in a mixed institute teacher give equal rights both of them. Moreover, it is beneficial for girls and boys to study with each other, in the next level of life they know how to work and talk with each other. For example, they gain various types of talent and personal skills itself and it helps both genders to mature in our future life. In my opinion, education in mixed school is more beneficial for the both genders, in a present day there are no discrimination between the genders. After that, parents are considered the mixed academic for their children as they know it is quite beneficial in the upcoming live stage and children also learn communicate skills with each other. In conclusion, both schools have their own place, but it depends on the parents and their children which school they perfer.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
deem that it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for a boy and a girl if they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
in the separate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
.
However
, others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it is quite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beneficial
when both genders are studying in co-education. I will discuss both perceptive my crumb of writing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
making a final note.

There are certain reasons behind there.
Firstly
, if both genders are a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
there are no hesitating during the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
.
For example
, they focus on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
and achieved their goals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
well.
However
, in a single
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
student have opportunities to choose our
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.
favourite
subject.
For instance
, if boys have chosen business subject, they focus on that subject and become a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
businessman in their lifeblood.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, that type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, pupils concentrates their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
and avoid the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, if both genders, they
Possible spelling mistake found.
leant
in co-education, they learn to respect each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
and find the solution
easily
related to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
.
Furthermore
, if both gender
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
in a mixed institute teacher give equal rights both of them.
Moreover
, it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beneficial
for girls and boys to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
with each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
, in the
next
level of life they know how to work and talk with each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
.
For example
, they gain various types of talent and personal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
itself and it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
both genders to mature in our future life.

In my opinion, education in mixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beneficial
for the both genders, in a present day there are no discrimination between the genders. After that, parents
are considered
the mixed academic for their children as they know it is quite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beneficial
in the upcoming
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
stage and children
also
learn
This verb is used with the infinitive: "to communicate"
communicate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
with each other.

In conclusion
, both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
place,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it depends on the parents and their children which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
they
Possible spelling mistake found.
perfer
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
A man who knows two languages is worth two men.
French Proverb

IELTS essay The man expresses his opinion about the proposal in the student's letter. Briefly summarize the proposal. Then state the man's opinion about the proposal and explain the reasons he gives for holding that opinion. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
305 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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