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The lifestyle and culture of different countries are becoming similar. Is it a positive development or negative? v.1

The lifestyle and culture of different countries are becoming similar. Is it a positive development or negative? v. 1
In recent times, the way of life and the customs of people in different nations are sharing more similarities. Despite the fact that this trend has negative effects on tourism, I believe that it is a positive development owing to it's enhancement of global interactions. A commonly cited negative outcome of this development is the decline in tourism due to the similarity in people's culture and lifestyle. Since people in different parts of the world now eat almost the same meals and wear similar clothes, the need to visit other countries so as to experience their customs and culture has reduced. For example, tourists to Nigeria have declined in recent decades, owing to the fact that they now visit only historical sites and they are less fascinated by the foods and dressing of many Nigerians, which is similar to their. Therefore, the similar way of life of many nations has negatively impaired on tourism. However, a positive effect of the worldwide similarity in lifestyle and culture is that it enhances interactions among people today. The nationals of various countries now have many things in common, such that they can easily communicate with each other, and promote trade. For instance, unlike a few decades ago, many Africans are no longer perplexed be the life of the Europeans and can now comfortably live in Europe. I believe this is an important development from sharing the way of life with people from other parts of the world. In conclusion, although, the similar culture and lifestyle in many countries has negatively affected tourism, I am of the view that it is a positive development because it has improved worldwide interactions.
In recent times, the way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and the customs of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
nations are sharing more similarities. Despite the fact that this trend has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects on tourism, I believe that it is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
owing
Did you mean "to its enhancement"?
to it's enhancement
of global interactions.

A
commonly
cited
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
outcome of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
is the decline in tourism due to the similarity in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and lifestyle. Since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
parts of the world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
eat almost the same meals and wear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
similar
clothes, the need to visit other countries
'So as to' expresses purpose and is used in formal texts. Consider using "to"
so as to
experience their customs and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
.
For example
, tourists to Nigeria have declined in recent decades, owing to the fact that they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
visit
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
historical
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
sites and
they are less fascinated by the foods and dressing of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Nigerians, which is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
similar
to their.
Therefore
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
similar
way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
nations has
negatively
impaired on tourism.

However
, a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effect of the worldwide similarity in lifestyle and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
is that it enhances interactions among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
. The nationals of various countries
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things in common, such that they can
easily
communicate with each other, and promote trade.
For instance
, unlike a few decades ago,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Africans are no longer perplexed be the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
of the Europeans and can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
comfortably
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in Europe. I believe this is an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
from sharing the way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from other parts of the world.

In conclusion
, although, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
similar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and lifestyle in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries has
negatively
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
tourism, I am of the view that it is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
worldwide interactions.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
24Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay The lifestyle and culture of different countries are becoming similar. Is it a positive development or negative? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
276 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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