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The information below gives details about household income and spending on food and clothes by an average family in one UK city in 2010 and 2013. v.1

The information below gives details about household income and spending on food and clothes by an average family in one UK city in 2010 and 2013. v. 1
Some people ponder that the individuals who are earning high wages are making their country better while others think that the authorities should control the limit of amount that people are getting in the form of monthly salaries. In my opinion, I think that government should not limit the amount of remuneration of well-paid jobs for people who are getting high pay scale doing tough jobs. There are a plethora of reasons behind the individuals who are getting high salaries doing better jobs for the nation. To begin with, most of the people who are doing hard jobs must be eligible for earning a good amount such as an army colonel, pilots, scientists et cetera. Such people have different work profile that makes the country so proudly. The life of these people is suffering from danger because of their work category. For instance, there is a lot of difference between the work of a clerk and a defence personnel. Hence, there is a gap between their monthly pay scale. On the other side, others people believe that the country's administration should control the high wages. This is because they think that the salary difference might be create a wealth gap between the people. In other words, the disparity gap between rich and poor people will definitely rise. It will affect the economy in the form of social gap. Therefore, some people want the equal level of salaries for all To sum up, doubtless, salaries are decided as per the working conditions in an organization. Some people are in afraid of wealth gap due to difference in salaries, but in reality, people who are earning a high scale doing hard jobs since they deserve a better remuneration.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
ponder that the individuals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are earning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
wages are making their country better while others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the authorities should control the limit of amount that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are getting in the form of monthly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
. In my opinion, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should not limit the amount of remuneration of well-paid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are getting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
pay scale
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
tough jobs.

There are a plethora of reasons behind the individuals
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are getting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
for the nation. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be eligible for earning a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
amount such as an army colonel, pilots,
Possible spelling mistake found.
scientists et
cetera. Such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
work profile that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the country
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
proudly
. The life of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
is suffering from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of their work category.
For instance
, there is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
difference between the work of a clerk and a
Possible spelling mistake. 'defence' is British English.
defence
personnel.
Hence
, there is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
between their monthly pay scale.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
side, others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that the country's administration should control the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
wages. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
difference might be
Consider using the past participle "created"?
create
a wealth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
between the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, the disparity
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
between rich and poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will definitely rise. It will affect the economy in the form of social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
want the equal level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
for all

To sum up, doubtless,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
are decided
as per the working conditions in an organization.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are in afraid of wealth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gap
due to difference in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in reality,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are earning a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
scale
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
since they deserve a better remuneration.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay The information below gives details about household income and spending on food and clothes by an average family in one UK city in 2010 and 2013. v. 1

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
286 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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