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Some people hold that we should spend amount of time and money on the protection of wild animals. Some people argue that they should be spent on human populations. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

Some people hold that we should spend amount of time and money on the protection of wild animals. Some people argue that they should be spent on human populations. v. 1
Whether, will power or physical health which is significant for success in sports have been the epicentre of discussion and a unanimous conclusive agreement is yet to be achieved. Different distinguish individual have expressed their views on it through multiple modes of communication is the mainstream media on the social media. In this essay I would like to delve into both the arguments before forming an opinion. To begin with, there are several reasons to play sports with mental strength. Firstly, there are many types of sports in which mental strength in necessities such as, Ludo, chess and so on. In these types of sports, there is no need of physical power, whereas only the mental ability is required. Secondly, sports without planning and strategy is incomplete. Furthermore, with the help of captains and team management they make some strategies and plans which which each and every player follow, while playing the game and in the end of the game they get positive results of making some strategies regarding the game. On the flip side, a certain segment of the society believes that physical strength is also playing a crucial role in any sports. There are various sports in which physical health is required, such as running, wrestling, Kabaddi and so on. For instance, When someone is participating in running, then the person is physically fit and running also helps to boost the stamina of the person. Moreover, playing sports helps kids and changes to remain fit which increase the capacity of the immune system. In addition to this, physical power enhances the personality of the person and also help them to increase their confidence level. In conclusion, those facts discussed above, we point out that both types of strengths are required in sports for success, but in some games only one particular strength is required.
Whether, will power or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
health which is significant for success in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
have been the
Possible spelling mistake. 'epicentre' is British English.
epicentre
of discussion and a unanimous conclusive agreement is
yet
to
be achieved
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Different
distinguish individual have expressed their views on it through multiple modes of communication is the mainstream media on the social media. In this essay I would like to delve into both the arguments
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
forming an opinion.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there are several reasons to play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
with mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
.
Firstly
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
in which mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
in necessities such as, Ludo, chess and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on. In these types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
, there is no need of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
power, whereas
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the mental ability is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
required
.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
without planning and strategy is incomplete.
Furthermore
, with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
of captains and team management they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
strategies and plans
Possible typo: you repeated a word
which which
each and every player follow, while playing the game and in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the game they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
results of making
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
strategies regarding the game.

On the flip side, a certain segment of the society believes that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
is
also
playing a crucial role in any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
. There are various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
in which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
health is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
required
, such as running, wrestling,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kabaddi
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
For instance
, When someone is participating in running, then the person is
physically
fit and running
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
to boost the stamina of the person.
Moreover
, playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
kids and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
to remain fit which increase the capacity of the immune system.
In addition
to this,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
physical
power enhances the personality of the person and
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them to increase their confidence level.

In conclusion
, those facts discussed above, we point out that both types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strengths
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
required
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
for success,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
games
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one particular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
strength
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
required
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
He who knows no foreign languages knows nothing of his own.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

IELTS essay Some people hold that we should spend amount of time and money on the protection of wild animals. Some people argue that they should be spent on human populations. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
306 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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