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The graph shows the teleworking rates by sex in the United Kingdom between 1997 and 2005 and the rates by occupation and location of workplace in 2005 v.1

The graph shows the teleworking rates by sex in the United Kingdom between 1997 and 2005 and the rates by occupation and location of workplace in 2005 v. 1
Over the passing decades, job-hopping has become an area to draw public attention and provoke controversies. There are many forces that foster the consistency of this problem and I strongly believe that the changing activity brings disadvantages. First of all, people switch jobs frequently in order to chase more demands, including both their internal and external factors. In terms of personality, relocation of working environment is among of reasons that cause to the working changing. Those who are lacking of progressive spirit and easily discouraged are more likely than peers to find a new career. People change their occupation to gain experience as they can learn new skills when being retrained in other fields. Besides, another factor that has added fuel to the fire is the dissatisfaction in the working environment. Employees who hardly get along well with their manager, leader making them quit their current profession. Some social researches have shown that discontenting over supervisors accounts for why people change the work these days. Changing career does seem to have some negative influences. To companies, this trend will make wasting time and expense of the recruitment process and job training for newbies. Additionally, switching job in quick lead to difficulties in landing a stable job in the future for job hunters Recruiters trend to not appreciate with resumes which job-hopping candidates. In conclusion, there are many reasons that account for the problem. And in the long run this development is more likely to put adverse impacts for both employees and society.
Over the passing decades, job-hopping has become an area to draw public attention and provoke controversies. There are
many
forces that foster the consistency of this problem and I
strongly
believe that the changing activity brings disadvantages.

First of all
,
people
switch
jobs
frequently
in order to chase more demands, including both their internal and external factors. In terms of personality, relocation of working environment is among of reasons that cause to the working changing. Those who are lacking of progressive spirit and
easily
discouraged are more likely than peers to find a new career.
People
change
their occupation to gain experience as they can learn new
skills
when
being retrained
in other fields.
Besides
, another factor that has
added
fuel to the fire is the dissatisfaction in the working environment. Employees who hardly
get
along well with their manager, leader making them quit their
current
profession.
Some
social researches have shown that discontenting over supervisors accounts for why
people
change
the work these days.

Changing career does seem to have
some
negative
influences. To
companies
, this trend will
make
wasting time and expense of the recruitment process and
job
training for newbies.
Additionally
, switching
job
in quick lead to difficulties in landing a stable
job
in the future for
job
hunters Recruiters trend to not appreciate with resumes which job-hopping candidates.

In conclusion
, there are
many
reasons that account for the problem. And in the long run this development is more likely to put adverse impacts for both employees and society.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay The graph shows the teleworking rates by sex in the United Kingdom between 1997 and 2005 and the rates by occupation and location of workplace in 2005 v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
252 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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