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The government should close companies that produce toxic waste materials without their own waste treatment facility in order to protect the environment. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.4

The government should close companies that produce toxic waste materials without their own waste treatment facility in order to protect the environment. v. 4
The official ruling monarch, needs to shut down organizations, which produces toxic components into the environment, and, lacking waste clearing services within, to save the environment. I agree in this regard that, most of the industries today, are currently working in an illegal manner, causing serious damage to the climate. However, these companies are encouraged by the legally appointed inspectors, which ignore the actions of entrepreneurs. On the one hand, Governments are planning to boost the economy of the nation, which is leading to the development of private industry, and causing exploitation of the ecosystem. To illustrate, several pharmaceutical enterprises, release tons of poisonous materials into the river banks. As a result, damaging ecosystems, and, destroying natural habitat, of the birds, and the fishes. Apart from that, these elements also combine into the open atmosphere, which react with atmospheric gases, and, finally reaches into the human respiratory system, leading to severe diseases, and also death. Hence, this sequence of events needs to be controlled efficiently to protect the biosphere. Moreover, In spite of the rise in employment opportunities, and country development towards progress, It should be necessary to keep a limit to an extent. For example, The legal bodies, and the officials, are required to take the steps, allowing only few limited areas to construct their multinational empire, at a specific location away from the society, and also the community. In addition to, a separate waste management system. This helps to save, by balancing the surroundings, and furthermore helping the citizens to consume the toxic free air, and to live a happy life, for both the adults, as well as, the toddlers. Finally, In conclusion, I conclude that, Despite of the trails by making the political territory developed, necessary measures need to be taken, to protect the hemisphere, and likewise balancing the human life, and the animal life. If it is not followed up immediately, It will forward to form consequences, which are harmful for both the world, as well as, the unions, affecting future generations.
The official ruling monarch, needs to shut down organizations, which produces toxic components into the environment, and, lacking waste clearing services within, to save the environment. I
agree
in this regard that, most of the industries
today
, are
currently
working
in an illegal manner
, causing serious damage to the climate.
However
, these
companies
are encouraged
by the
legally
appointed inspectors, which
ignore
the actions of entrepreneurs.

On the one hand,
Governments
are planning to boost the economy of the nation, which is leading to the development of
private industry
, and causing exploitation of the ecosystem. To illustrate, several pharmaceutical enterprises, release tons of poisonous materials into the river banks.
As a result
, damaging ecosystems, and, destroying natural habitat, of the birds, and the fishes. Apart from that, these elements
also
combine into the open atmosphere, which react with atmospheric gases, and,
finally
reaches into the human respiratory system, leading to severe diseases, and
also
death.
Hence
, this sequence of
events
needs to
be controlled
efficiently
to protect the biosphere.

Moreover
,
In spite of
the rise in employment opportunities, and country development towards progress, It should be necessary to
keep
a limit to an extent.
For example
, The legal bodies, and the officials,
are required
to take the steps, allowing
only
few limited areas to construct their multinational empire, at a specific location away from the society, and
also
the community.
In addition
to, a separate waste management system. This
helps
to save, by balancing the surroundings, and
furthermore
helping the citizens to consume the toxic free air, and to
live
a happy life, for both the adults,
as well as
, the toddlers.

Finally
,
In conclusion
, I conclude that,
Despite of
the trails by making the political territory developed, necessary measures need to
be taken
, to protect the hemisphere, and
likewise
balancing the human life, and the animal life. If it is not followed up immediately, It will forward to form consequences, which are harmful for both the world,
as well as
, the unions, affecting future generations.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes
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IELTS essay The government should close companies that produce toxic waste materials without their own waste treatment facility in order to protect the environment. v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
336 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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