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The gap between the rich and the poor becomes wider. What is the causes of this? What can be done to solve this? v.1

The gap between the rich and the poor becomes wider. What is the causes of this? What can be done to solve this? v. 1
Many might believe automobiles to be the main mean of transportation, however others claim that bicycles have more conveniences. This essay analyses both perspectives and why I conceive that cycling is superior to driving. On the one hand, people tend to get a destination quicker when they choose automobiles as a source of transport. While cars are supposed to have significant speed patterns, individuals can avoid consuming much time by driving motor cars. For instance, those who acquire a job which demands constant movement from one location to another may benefit from using cars because then they are most likely to have, for example, meetings or conferences on time. Furthermore, recent report of the Times reviewed that in the US 70% of individuals prefer to move by motor car due to its factor of saving time. On the other hand, gas emissions would be reduced if people travel more by bicycle. It is commonly understood that cars produce toxic gases which cause air pollution and whilst cycling is environmental-friendly activity, riding bicycles can certainly prevent the atmosphere from being polluted. For example, WHO suggests that bicycles ought to be more involved in China's transportation in order to minimize the level of carbon dioxide as China's air is considerably polluted by even cars’ engines. Hence, the report like this clearly reveals that cycling encourages a reduction of air pollution. In conclusion, both arguments have strong support. However, because motor cars have the detrimental impact on environment producing exhaust fumes, the idea of moving entirely by automobiles remains unlikely. I thus feel bicycles should be more engaged in travelling.
Many might
believe automobiles to be the main mean of transportation,
however
others claim that
bicycles
have more conveniences. This essay analyses both perspectives and why I conceive that cycling is superior to driving.

On the one hand,
people
tend to
get
a destination quicker when they choose automobiles as a source of transport. While
cars
are supposed
to have significant speed patterns, individuals can avoid consuming much time by driving motor
cars
.
For instance
, those who acquire a job which demands constant movement from one location to another may benefit from using
cars
because
then they are most likely to have,
for example
, meetings or conferences on time.
Furthermore
, recent report of the Times reviewed that in the US 70% of individuals prefer to
move
by motor
car
due to its factor of saving time.

On the other hand
, gas emissions would be
reduced
if
people
travel more by
bicycle
. It is
commonly
understood that
cars
produce toxic gases which cause air pollution and whilst cycling is environmental-friendly activity, riding
bicycles
can
certainly
prevent
the atmosphere from
being polluted
.
For example
, WHO suggests that
bicycles
ought to be more involved in China's transportation in order to minimize the level of carbon dioxide as China's air is
considerably
polluted by even
cars’
engines.
Hence
, the report like this
clearly
reveals that cycling encourages a reduction of air pollution.

In conclusion
, both arguments have strong support.
However
,
because
motor
cars
have the detrimental impact on environment producing exhaust fumes, the
idea
of moving
entirely
by automobiles remains unlikely. I
thus
feel
bicycles
should be more engaged in travelling.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
The limits of my language are the limits of my world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay The gap between the rich and the poor becomes wider. What is the causes of this? What can be done to solve this? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
267 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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