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The gap between rich and poor is ggrowing. What problems does this create? . What can be done to tackle them? v.1

The gap between rich and poor is ggrowing. What problems does this create? . What can be done to tackle them? v. 1
In this internet age, a new online store can be opened in less than a day. This has both positive and negative consequences. While, web-based shopping has eased customer experience tremendously, it has also led to increased number of felonies. This essay discusses several approaches to tackle and curb down this problem. First and foremost, consumers need to be more aware and vigilant. In the world of internet shopping, there is no face to face communication between the buyer and the seller. Therefore, the probability of a fraud is very high. In order to curtail this, the buyer should check the reviews of the web-based store. For example, a quick check on the Facebook wall of the shop or google customer reviews will go a long way in making the consumer understand the fairness of the store. Secondly, in this age of instant online shopping the government needs to come up with contemporary, stricter rules for the internet based shops. For instance, it has been observed in South Africa that stricter punishments for internet frauds reduced the number of criminal activities by more than half. Furthermore, the internet sellers can themselves come together to form a trade organisation to impose trade rules on every seller. This will lead to a healthy and fair competition amongst the web sellers. This can be coupled with cropping up of several watchdogs to moderate the availability of such online stores. To conclude, although it seems daunting, in my view, if some of the above steps are incorporated diligently, online criminal activities will reduce considerably.
In this internet age, a new
online
store can
be opened
in less than a day. This has both
positive
and
negative
consequences. While, web-based shopping has
eased
customer experience
tremendously
, it has
also
led to increased number of felonies. This essay discusses several approaches to tackle and curb down this problem.

First
and foremost, consumers need to be more aware and vigilant. In the world of internet shopping, there is no face to face communication between the buyer and the
seller
.
Therefore
, the probability of a fraud is
very
high. In order to curtail this, the buyer should
check
the reviews of the web-based store.
For example
, a quick
check
on the Facebook wall of the shop or google customer reviews will go a long way in making the consumer understand the fairness of the store.

Secondly
, in this age of instant
online
shopping the
government
needs to
come
up with contemporary, stricter
rules
for the internet based shops.
For instance
, it has
been observed
in South Africa that stricter punishments for internet frauds
reduced
the number of criminal activities by more than half.
Furthermore
, the internet
sellers
can themselves
come
together to form a trade
organisation
to impose trade
rules
on every
seller
. This will lead to a healthy and
fair
competition amongst the web
sellers
. This can
be coupled
with cropping up of several watchdogs to moderate the availability of such
online
stores.

To conclude
, although it seems daunting, in my view, if
some of the
above steps
are incorporated
diligently
,
online
criminal activities will
reduce
considerably
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay The gap between rich and poor is ggrowing. What problems does this create? . What can be done to tackle them? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
260 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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