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The gap between rich and poor is ggrowing. What problems does this create? . What can be done to tackle them? v.2

The gap between rich and poor is ggrowing. What problems does this create? . What can be done to tackle them? v. 2
It is undoubtedly true that the disparity between the rich and poor is increasing day by day, as the wealthy people becoming richest and poor people grow poorer. This essay will describe the challenge came along this trend and provide right solution to solve them. One of the main problems caused by unequal distributions of wealth is inaccessible of education for poverty-stricken people. Nowadays, quality education are becoming very expensive. There are excellent college and university which are very costly and cannot afford by beggarly people, due to this people cannot get better education which are essential for high-paying job and became poorer. Another important issue are the increases in crime rates. Most of people often do not make nought money to fulfill their basic needs and then they start to do heinous act like robbery, murder, and thief. For an instance, recent reports of crime, it was mention that there is increase 50% crime which done only for their basic needs. Although these problems are serious, it is possible to find its solution. first of all, government should introduce financial schemes and scholarship for the talented, economically poor student that they can get b quality education they deserve. This will surely give them fair chance to compete with the rich. Another solution is high authority should provides employment opportunity for financially weak people, which will automatically increase their income and living standard, but also reduces crime rate. To illustrate, government of Nepal has provided different job opportunity and the sscholarships scheme based on their economic circumstance and talent. Hence effective measures must be applied to reduce the gap between wealthy and destitute people. In conclusion, this trend of expanding gap between rich and par has become one of the complicated and complex issue, so proper action btaken immensely by increasing education and job opportunities.
It is
undoubtedly
true that the disparity between the rich and poor is increasing day by day, as the wealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
becoming richest and poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
grow poorer. This essay will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
the challenge came along this trend and provide right solution to solve them.

One of the main problems caused by unequal distributions of wealth is inaccessible of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
for poverty-stricken
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Nowadays, quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
are becoming
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
expensive. There are excellent college and university which are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
costly and cannot afford by
beggarly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, due to this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
which are essential for high-paying job and became poorer. Another
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
issue are the increases in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rates. Most of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
Possible spelling mistake found.
nought
money to fulfill their basic
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
needs and
then they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to do heinous act like robbery, murder, and thief. For an instance, recent reports of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
, it was mention that there is increase 50%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
which done
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for their basic needs.

Although these problems are serious, it is possible to find its solution.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
first of all
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should introduce financial schemes and scholarship for the talented,
economically
poor student that they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
b quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
they deserve. This will
surely
give them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fair
chance to compete with the rich. Another solution is high authority should
The verb 'should' requires the base form of the verb: "provide"
provides
employment opportunity for
financially
weak
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, which will
automatically
increase their income and living standard,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rate. To illustrate,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
of Nepal has provided
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
job opportunity and the
Possible spelling mistake found.
sscholarships
scheme based on their economic circumstance and talent.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Hence
effective measures
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be applied
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the gap between wealthy and destitute
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

In conclusion
, this trend of expanding gap between rich and par has become one of the complicated and complex issue,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
proper action
Possible spelling mistake found.
btaken
immensely
by increasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and job opportunities.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
16Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay The gap between rich and poor is ggrowing. What problems does this create? . What can be done to tackle them? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
305 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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