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The first car appeared on British roads in 1888. By the year 2000 there may be as many as 29 million vehicles on British roads. Alternative forms of transport should be encouraged and international laws introduced to control car ownership and use. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience. v.7

The first car appeared on British roads in 1888. By the year 2000 there may be as many as 29 million vehicles on British roads. Alternative forms of transport should be encouraged and international laws introduced to control car ownership and use. v. 7
In 1886, the first modern car was invented by Karl Benz and the first car appeared on British roads in 1888. Cars became widely available in the 20th century. By the year 2000, there were may be as many as 29 million vehicles on British roads. Public transport should be encouraged and international laws introduce to control the amount of car ownership and use. I totally agree with this suggestion because too many cars on roads can cause pollution, increment of accident as while as a waste of resources. The usage of car is one of the core reasons of pollution. Cars can exhaust pollutant gas such as carbon dioxide, sulphide, and nitrogen. All these gases can pollute our air and affect our environment by causing global warming, ozone depletion as while as acid rainfalls. For example, New Delhi, one of the cities that has the most cars in the world, the air condition there is chronically worst. Every breaths that the people breath in every minute equal to two packs of cigarette. According to a scientific research, due to overused of cars, our temperature has increased from 27 degrees to 33 degrees in 20 years time. The melting of ice shelves, desertion and climate change are indirectly caused by the overused of cars. The ownership and use of car should be controlled to protect our motherland from being polluted. Besides that, the amount of traffic accident has shown great increment since cars gain fame. There are too many cars on the road right now and this situation has caused heavy traffic jams especially during peak hour. All drivers drive fiercely to be able to reach their destination on time. It is a usual phenomenon to see drivers speeding and ran a red light. Furthermore, drivers get frustrated easily due to hectic heavy jams and they may not make the right judgment while driving. All these issues are causing the increment of traffic accidents nowadays. So, public transports should be encouraged and international laws should be introduced to restrict car ownership and usage to ensure the safety of all road users. Moreover, cars nowadays are bought due to satisfied desire and this cause waste of resources. To product a car, we need materials such as metal, iron and rubber. Most of these are not renewable resources. Cars also need to pump petrol or diesel to be able to generate. We should cherish all these precious resources for other meaningful usages. In the other hand, car's tyres need to be changed every year. Imagine, a car need to change 4 tyres a year. There are millions of cars around the world. We create so many not recycled tyres every year and all these are thrown into our ocean. The government must limit the purchase and usage of car and promote public transport. In conclusion, the invention of car has brought a lot of convenience to our life. There are costs and benefits of car use. Overloaded amount of vehicles has become a headache to British's society. Government should take some relevant actions to promote public transportation and implement laws to control automobile ownership and use.
In 1886, the
first
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
was invented
by Karl Benz and the
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
appeared on British
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
in 1888.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Cars
became
widely
available in the 20th century. By the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2000, there
Did you mean "where may be"?
were may be
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
as 29 million vehicles on British
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Public
transport should
be encouraged
and international laws introduce to control the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ownership
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
. I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this suggestion
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
can cause pollution, increment of accident as while as a waste of resources.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
usage
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
is one of the core reasons of pollution.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Cars
can exhaust pollutant gas such as carbon dioxide,
Possible spelling mistake. 'sulphide' is British English.
sulphide
, and nitrogen. All these gases can pollute our air and affect our environment by causing global warming, ozone depletion as while as acid rainfalls.
For example
, New Delhi, one of the cities that has the most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
in the world, the air condition there is
chronically
worst. Every
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "breath"?
breaths
that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
breath in every minute equal to two
Possible agreement error. The noun 'cigarette' seems to be countable; consider using: "packs of cigarettes".
packs of cigarette
. According to a scientific research, due to overused of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
, our temperature has increased from 27 degrees to 33 degrees in 20 years time. The melting of ice shelves, desertion and climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
are
indirectly
caused by the overused of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ownership
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
should
be controlled
to protect our motherland from
being polluted
.

Besides
that, the amount of traffic accident has shown great increment since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
gain fame. There are too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
right
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
and this situation has caused heavy traffic jams
especially
during peak hour. All drivers drive
fiercely
to be able to reach their destination on time. It is a usual phenomenon to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
drivers speeding and ran a red light.
Furthermore
, drivers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
frustrated
easily
due to hectic heavy
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
jams and
they may not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the right judgment while driving. All these issues are causing the increment of traffic accidents nowadays.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
transports should
be encouraged
and international laws should
be introduced
to restrict
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ownership
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
usage
to ensure the safety of all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
users.

Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
nowadays are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
due to satisfied desire and this cause waste of resources. To product a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
, we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
materials such as metal, iron and rubber. Most of these are not renewable resources.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Cars
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to pump petrol or diesel to be able to generate. We should cherish all these precious resources for other meaningful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
usages
. In the other hand, car's
Possible spelling mistake. 'tyres' is British English.
tyres
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
. Imagine, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
4
Possible spelling mistake. 'tyres' is British English.
tyres
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
. There are millions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
around the world. We create
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
not recycled
Possible spelling mistake. 'tyres' is British English.
tyres
every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
and all these
are thrown
into our ocean. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
limit the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
usage
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
and promote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
transport.

In conclusion
, the invention of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
has brought
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
convenience to our life. There are costs and benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
. Overloaded amount of vehicles has become a headache to British's society.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
should take
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
relevant actions to promote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
transportation and implement laws to control automobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ownership
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
47Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
Change your language and you change your thoughts.
Karl Albrecht

IELTS essay The first car appeared on British roads in 1888. By the year 2000 there may be as many as 29 million vehicles on British roads. Alternative forms of transport should be encouraged and international laws introduced to control car ownership and use. v. 7

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
524 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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