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the economic growth in developing and developed countries is making people richer. However the researches indicates that people in developing countries is happier than people in developed countries. what is your opinion? v.1

the economic growth in developing and developed countries is making people richer. However the researches indicates that people in developing countries is happier than people in developed countries. what is your opinion? v. 1
Today, concerns are high about how digital age changes the way of communication. Some argue that, internet is not a reliable source of finding information. Let us examine both views before reaching a concrete decision. It is true that, internet has developed communication process. Therefore, it makes instant communication throughout the world. For instance, social media is the best way to interact with people, and this is associated with the internet. Furthermore, it has changed the way People conduct business, and the manner we conduct our personal and social lives. In fact, we can text, SMS and email through a link to anyone all over the world. On the other hand, as it brings lots of benefits of communication, although, the internet is not a reliable source to get news. However, all the data we get through online are not always true, and sometimes it leads people wrong way. For example, there are fraud people out there who try to mislead people by providing false data. Additionally, in our daily life we involve with many activities so that, we need to collect information, but not all the news are available online. Such as, when we need to take prosecution against someone, we have to talk to someone who knows legislation and works for that. It's not possible to get idea from online In conclusion, whenever we need to communicate with people we can do it in a second using internet. In my opinion, this not only helps people to connect with each other, but also provides us the information whenever we need it. Sometimes it is authorised.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
, concerns are high about how digital age
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
the way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
argue that, internet is not a reliable source of finding information.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
us examine both views
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
reaching a concrete decision.

It is true that, internet has developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
process.
Therefore
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
instant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
throughout the world.
For instance
, social media is the best way to interact with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, and this
is associated
with the internet.
Furthermore
, it has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
the way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
conduct business, and the manner we conduct our personal and social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. In fact, we can text, SMS and email through a link to anyone all over the world.

On the other hand
, as it brings lots of benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
communication
, although, the internet is not a reliable source to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
news.
However
, all the data we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
through online are not always true, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
it leads
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
way.
For example
, there are fraud
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
out there who try to mislead
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
by providing false data.
Additionally
, in our daily life we involve with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
activities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that, we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to collect information,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not all the news are available online. Such as, when we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to take prosecution against someone, we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
talk to someone who knows legislation and works for that. It's not possible to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
from
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
online


In conclusion
, whenever we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to communicate with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
we can do it in a second using internet. In my opinion, this not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to connect with each other,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
provides us the information whenever we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
it.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
it is
Possible spelling mistake. 'authorised' is British English.
authorised
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
A different language is a different vision of life.
Federico Fellini

IELTS essay the economic growth in developing and developed countries is making people richer. However the researches indicates that people in developing countries is happier than people in developed countries. what is your opinion? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
267 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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