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In recent time economic growth has made some people richer in both developed and developing countries. While studies show that people in developing countries are happier now than before, people in developed countries are no happier than they were before. v.3

In recent time economic growth has made some people richer in both developed and developing countries. While studies show that people in developing countries are happier now than before, people in developed countries are no happier than they were before. v. 3
At recent years, the economic conditions have been developed in all countries in the world. However, it seems that developing countries have better achievement in increasing their happiness indicator rather than developed countries. There are several things that can be learned from this phenomenon and I will try to elaborate them in this essay. Psychologically, rich countries have achieved their economic peak describing the massive productivity and superiority in well-known thrived multinational industries and by the time passed by the stagnancy occurred. Dissimilar with it, emerging countries have been trying so hard to pursue the enrollment in economy indicators, and as a result, they achieved them and easily felt happy with the overwhelming results. This is the dire impact for developed countries because they are afraid by the economy theory stating there will be always a victim in economic competition. Apart from that, developing countries have been thriving so fast by fixing their government expenditure, increasing and improving the environment of local businesses which drive the huge number of investments. As results, there is up-going growth in employment indicators and an improvement in individual spending because they have revenues by huge working opportunities. These happen in China, Brazil, Indonesia, and India. Meanwhile, developed countries such America, Japan, and European Industrial Countries have maximised the usage of their resources so they are encouraged to develop their factories overseas by outsourcing the workers from local developing countries which give benefits for poor countries in many ways. In conclusion, the theory of “economy cycle” driven by business cycle theory is inevitable arguing that a country who has reached the maximum outcomes in economy, will suffer a daunt fall whether it will be significant or steady is based on the effective efforts by the country.
At recent years, the economic conditions have been
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
in all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in the world.
However
, it seems that developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have better achievement in increasing their happiness indicator
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. There are several things that can
be learned
from this phenomenon and I will try to elaborate them in this essay.

Psychologically
, rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have achieved their economic peak describing the massive productivity and superiority in well-known thrived multinational industries and by the time passed by the stagnancy occurred. Dissimilar with it, emerging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have been trying
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to pursue the enrollment in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economy
indicators, and
as a result
, they achieved them and
easily
felt happy with the overwhelming results. This is the dire impact for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are afraid by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economy
theory stating there will be always a victim in economic competition.

Apart from that, developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have been thriving
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
by fixing their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
expenditure, increasing and improving the environment of local businesses which drive the huge number of investments. As results, there is up-going growth in employment indicators and an improvement in individual spending
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have revenues by huge working opportunities. These happen in China, Brazil, Indonesia, and India. Meanwhile,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
such America, Japan, and European Industrial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Countries
have
Possible spelling mistake. 'maximised' is British English.
maximised
the usage of their resources
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they
are encouraged
to develop their factories overseas by outsourcing the workers from local developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
which give benefits for poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways.

In conclusion
, the theory of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
“economy
cycle” driven by business cycle theory is inevitable arguing that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
who has reached the maximum outcomes in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
economy
, will suffer
After 'a', do not use a verb. Make sure that the spelling of 'daunt' is correct. If 'daunt' is the first word in a compound adjective, use a hyphen between the two words. Note: This error message can occur if you use a verb as a noun, and the word is not a noun in standard English.
a daunt
fall whether it will be significant or steady
is based
on the effective efforts by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
21Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay In recent time economic growth has made some people richer in both developed and developing countries. While studies show that people in developing countries are happier now than before, people in developed countries are no happier than they were before. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
291 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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