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The cost of medical healthcare are increasing all the time. Governments are finding it difficult to balance the health care budget. Should citizens be totally responsible for their own health costs and take out private health insurance, or it is better to v.2

The cost of medical healthcare are increasing all the time. Governments are finding it difficult to balance the health care budget. Should citizens be totally responsible for their own health costs and take out private health insurance, or it is better to v. 2
It is undeniable that as years went by, the prices of healthcare services are getting expensive and for some countries, their government is having a dilemma to properly allocate the nation' s budget with this sector. While other people suggest that it should be every individual' s responsibility to pay their medical bills by getting private health insurance, I however believe that it is the responsibility of the government to allocate a certain amount of budget to provide free healthcare to its citizens. On the one hand, there are beneficial aspects that people can relish when getting a private health insurance. Firstly, they can choose the services that are essential and applicable for their medical needs. Secondly, once they opt for this kind of system, almost all kind of procedures and tests are free of charge and they get to choose an institution that has state-of-the-art facilities. Finally, extra fees can be refunded for some insurance company if their services were not used after few years of payment. For instance, Maxicare, which is a private health insurance in the Philippines, has a regulation that state, once fully paid for 10 years, half of what they paid will be converted to cash and still get to avail 100% of the medical services as a token of loyalty to the company. On the other hand, there are also valuable reasons that the government should provide always the needed budget for the healthcare of its denizens. First and foremost, the taxes paid by the people should be allocated to vital sectors of the nation and one of them is for the medical services, because this will uplift the public’s whole being that they are given importance by the government. Moreover, citizens not only give away their hard earn money to help the government to build infrastructures and other facilities for the people but also to consider to aid the health care system, as it will benefit the citizens to become more productive, and can easily seek medical attention when needed the most. Last but not least, the poverty-stricken sector of the community will enormously benefit with this free of charge services. To exemplify, the president of the Philippines signed a memorandum that a free healthcare to all can be applied not only for taxpayers but also to the oppressed group of the nation where in they can be admitted without paying in institutions that are funded by the government. In conclusion, getting health care insurance can be beneficial especially for people who can afford to purchase it, however, the government should take into consideration that not all citizens can afford to pay for it, therefore, it is still their responsibility to provide free healthcare to the people.
It is undeniable that as years went by, the prices of healthcare
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
are getting expensive and for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries, their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is having a dilemma to
properly
allocate the
Possible spelling mistake found.
nation&
#039; s budget with this sector. While other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
suggest that it should be every
Possible spelling mistake found.
individual&
#039; s responsibility to pay their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
bills by getting private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
insurance
, I
however
believe that it is the responsibility of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to allocate a certain amount of budget to provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
healthcare to its citizens.

On the one hand, there are beneficial aspects that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can relish when getting a private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
insurance
.
Firstly
, they can choose the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
that are essential and applicable for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
needs.
Secondly
, once they opt for this kind of system, almost all kind of procedures and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tests
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
of
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
charge and
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to choose an institution that has state-of-the-art facilities.
Finally
, extra fees can
be refunded
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
insurance
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
if their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
were not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
after few years of payment.
For instance
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Maxicare
, which is a private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
insurance
in the Philippines, has a regulation that state, once
fully
paid for 10 years, half of what they paid will
be converted
to cash and
still
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to avail 100% of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
as a token of loyalty to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.

On the other hand
, there are
also
valuable reasons that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
The adverb 'always' is usually put before the verb 'provide'.
provide always
the needed budget for the healthcare of its denizens.
First
and foremost, the taxes paid by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
be allocated
to vital sectors of the nation and one of them is for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
this will uplift the public’s whole being that they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
importance by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
.
Moreover
, citizens not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
give away their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
earn money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to build infrastructures and other facilities for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
to
The verb 'consider' is used with the gerund form: "consider aiding".
consider to aid
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
care system, as it will benefit the citizens to become more productive, and can
easily
seek
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
attention when needed the most. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least, the poverty-stricken sector of the community will
enormously
benefit with this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
of charge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
. To exemplify, the president of the Philippines signed a memorandum that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
healthcare to all can
be applied
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for taxpayers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
to the oppressed group of the nation where in they can
be admitted
without paying in institutions that
are funded
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
.

In conclusion
, getting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
care
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
insurance
can be beneficial
especially
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who can afford to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
it,
however
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should take into consideration that not all citizens can afford to pay for it,
therefore
, it is
still
their responsibility to provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
healthcare to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
20Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
38Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS essay The cost of medical healthcare are increasing all the time. Governments are finding it difficult to balance the health care budget. Should citizens be totally responsible for their own health costs and take out private health insurance, or it is better to v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
454 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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