Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The charts below show the average annual spending for Canadian households in the year 1972 and the year 2002. v.1

The charts below show the average annual spending for Canadian households in the year 1972 and the year 2002. v. 1
A lot of people have contemplation that to succeed in a specific game one should have an innate ability; however, a few people think differently and hold an opinion that by persistence and rigorous coaching, success can be achieved. This essay looks at both of the aspects with a favourable inclination towards a passionate approach of learning. I opine that it is essential to excel in any sport to have inner qualities, but the role of an instructor and the determination in doing activities should be weighed highly than the former view. To begin with, to become a sportsman, it is quite pertinent to have some required qualities of its own, which should reflect on a person. For instance, Sachin Tendulkar was passionate for the cricket due to which he got the recognition in the sport. As a result, he got selected in the Indian Cricket Team for playing matches for the nation. Therefore, it is irrefutable that without the inner spark one can never reach up to the destination. On the other hand, providing the right direction to the fire of doing something can be done only through effective coaching. To take an example, recently PV Sindhu won the world championship in badminton for which she gave the entire credit to her coach as well as her countless efforts in sharpening her skills. Consequently, she won a big prize and earned fame on the international level and make her country proud. To finalise, although it is undeniable that without possessing some self-abilities one cannot enter in the desired field, it is more important to give the excellent training to the sport person, so he or she can be prepared to face all types of challenges. Hence, in my opinion, accurate coaching and the hard work of the player also play a crucial role in getting the success, and these should be given more value instead of inner qualities.
A lot of
people
have contemplation that to succeed in a specific game one should have an innate ability;
however
, a few
people
think
differently
and hold an opinion that by persistence and rigorous coaching, success can
be achieved
. This essay looks at both of the aspects with a
favourable
inclination towards a passionate approach of learning. I opine that it is essential to excel in any sport to have inner qualities,
but
the role of an instructor and the determination in doing activities should
be weighed
highly
than the former view.

To
begin
with, to become a sportsman, it is quite pertinent to have
some
required qualities of its
own
, which should reflect on a person.
For instance
,
Sachin
Tendulkar
was passionate for the cricket due to which he
got
the recognition in the sport.
As a result
, he
got
selected in the Indian Cricket Team for playing matches for the nation.
Therefore
, it is irrefutable that without the inner spark one can never reach up to the destination.

On the other hand
, providing the right direction to the fire of doing something can
be done
only
through effective coaching. To take an example, recently PV
Sindhu
won the world championship in badminton for which she gave the entire credit to her coach
as well
as her countless efforts in sharpening her
skills
.
Consequently
, she won a
big
prize and earned fame on the international level and
make
her country proud.

To
finalise
, although it is undeniable that without possessing
some
self-abilities one cannot
enter in the desired
field, it is more
important
to give the excellent training to the sport person,
so
he or she can
be prepared
to face all types of challenges.
Hence
, in my opinion, accurate coaching and the
hard
work of the player
also
play a crucial role in getting the success, and these should be
given
more value
instead
of inner qualities.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
The man who does not know other languages, unless he is a man of genius, necessarily has deficiencies in his ideas.
Victor Hugo

IELTS essay The charts below show the average annual spending for Canadian households in the year 1972 and the year 2002. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
319 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts