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The chart of marriages and divorces rates in US between 1970 and 2000 and the marital status of adult American in the same period. v.1

The chart of marriages and divorces rates in US between 1970 and 2000 and the marital status of adult American in the same period. v. 1
The electronic devices, through which people can get information of the world, play a pivotal role by knowing the fact and figure of the outer world. It is a controversial whether radio makes people hilarious and at the same time, telecast pragmatic information or television does that one. From my point of view, I, holistically, agree that the idiot box is more enjoyable and provides real data. First and foremost, the TV set has visual and sound features and the TV screen can be changed as well. This is the intriguing features for which people prefer to watch TV. The other reason is that people can understand easily what is the purpose of the character, since people can hear and look the movement of that portrait character. For example, when any serious political thought reveals in the TV, people get the evidence. As a result, if any politicians deny the fact which has been told in the live telecast, other opponents could show the proof with record and video. Moreover, children and adult love watch cartoons, serials, et Cetra on the TV which satisfy the mind of people. Therefore, whatever the object is shown on TV, attracts of all ages. On the contrary, the radio has only one salient feature that is sound. This sound comes from one or more people who talk on the microphone. In addition, the radio is unable to show the character or host visually which sounds uninteresting. Besides that it, invariably, telecasts advertisement intermittently during any types of programs which are annoying. For instance, last night, I was listening the radio where a ghost story was told by a person, but in the throe of the show, one very noisy advertisement comes that spoil the whole interest in the ghost tale. It can also be added that it is impossible for people to hear any serious conversation, because the way radio broadcaster is very fast forward. Ergo, the radio is neither practical nor relish visually. In conclusion, most of the people prefer radio to magical box. However, I second that watching TV provides people a huge information with evidence which, is more powerful than the radio.
The electronic devices, through which
people
can
get
information of the world, play a pivotal role by knowing the fact and figure of the outer world. It is a controversial whether
radio
makes
people
hilarious and at the same time, telecast pragmatic information or television does that one. From my point of view, I,
holistically
,
agree
that the idiot box is more enjoyable and provides real data.

First
and foremost, the TV set has visual and
sound
features and the TV screen can be
changed
as well
. This is the intriguing features for which
people
prefer to
watch
TV. The other reason is that
people
can understand
easily
what is the purpose of the character, since
people
can hear and look the movement of that portrait character.
For example
, when any serious political
thought
reveals
in the TV
,
people
get
the evidence.
As a result
, if any politicians deny the fact which has been
told
in the
live
telecast, other opponents could
show
the proof with record and video.
Moreover
, children and adult
love
watch
cartoons, serials,
et
Cetra
on the TV which satisfy the mind of
people
.
Therefore
, whatever the object
is shown
on TV, attracts of all ages.

On the contrary
, the
radio
has
only
one salient feature
that is
sound
. This
sound
comes
from one or more
people
who talk on the microphone.
In addition
, the
radio
is unable to
show
the character or host
visually
which
sounds
uninteresting.
Besides
that it,
invariably
, telecasts advertisement
intermittently
during any types of programs which are annoying.
For instance
, last night, I was listening the
radio
where a ghost story was
told
by a person,
but
in the throe of the
show
, one
very
noisy advertisement
comes
that spoil the whole interest in the ghost tale. It can
also
be
added
that it is impossible for
people
to hear any serious conversation,
because
the way
radio
broadcaster is
very
fast forward
. Ergo, the
radio
is neither practical nor relish
visually
.

In conclusion
, most of the
people
prefer
radio
to magical box.
However
, I second that watching TV provides
people
a huge information
with evidence which, is more powerful than the
radio
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay The chart of marriages and divorces rates in US between 1970 and 2000 and the marital status of adult American in the same period. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
361 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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