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Some people believe they should keep all the money they have earned and should not pay tax to the state Do you agree or disagree v.1

Some people believe they should keep all the money they have earned and should not pay tax to the state v. 1
It is believed by many people that instinct ability is the key to success of a sports person, while some pragmatic people think that working hard and regular exercise on sport make an athletic person to achieve the target. In my opinion, if any, sports person wants to fulfil the goal in the sport world, he or she needs to have natural talent, industriousness, practical experience, because only one of these qualities would not be able to gain success. First and foremost, the reason is that if a sportsman has only natural talent, but he or she does not practice well. Then he will not be able to be in the top rank in the sports world. For example, Shachin Tandulker, an Indian all- rounder in cricket, has natural ability. Despite that, he has practiced cricket since his childhood. For that reason, he won the man of the match several times, World Cup as well. Moreover, the instinct quality in sport succours a playful boy to be more supportive, agile and sharper- all these qualities could, invariably, helps to prosper in games such as the Olympic Games, World Cup match, and so on. Therefore, besides natural calibre of a sports person, it is pre-requisite to have exercise and hard work with enthusiasm. In contrast, those who believe that only people who do a lot of tasks on the selected sports, could advance themselves in the sports world, it is wrong. This is because, after doing a stupendous amount of giving activities, any sportsmen may loss energy as well as metal support. For instance, Virat Koholi, who is an Indian cricketer, have no natural knowledge of cricket, even though he has achieved moderately whatever he wants. However, he did not win the World Cup- the most desired trophies which are wanted by all players. The reason is that he has lack of natural ability which neither gives him confidence nor the energy of the brain. Ergo, it is true that only practice does not take a person on the top ladder. In conclusion, although instinct capacity helps to achieve the target in the sport world, it is said by people, some people also say that acquiring talent in sport by determination and practice could help to become a successful sports person. From my perspective, if a person wants to become stars in the sport world, he or she has to have natural talent, lots of exercise, and hard work.
It
is believed
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that instinct ability is the key to success of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
pragmatic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
and regular exercise on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
an athletic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
to achieve the target. In my opinion, if any,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
wants to fulfil the goal in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
, he or she needs to have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talent
, industriousness, practical experience,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
one of these qualities would not be able to gain success.

First
and foremost, the reason is that if a sportsman has
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talent
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
he or she does not practice well. Then he will not be able to be in the top rank in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
.
For example
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Shachin
Possible spelling mistake found.
Tandulker
, an Indian all- rounder in cricket, has
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
ability. Despite that, he has practiced cricket since his childhood. For that reason, he won the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
of the match several times,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
World
Cup
as well
.
Moreover
, the instinct quality in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
Possible spelling mistake found.
succours
a playful boy to be more supportive, agile and sharper- all these qualities could,
invariably
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to prosper in games such as the Olympic Games,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
World
Cup match, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
Therefore
,
besides
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
Possible spelling mistake. 'calibre' is British English.
calibre
of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
, it is
Possible spelling mistake found.
pre-requisite
to have exercise and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work with enthusiasm.

In contrast
, those who believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
tasks on the selected
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
, could advance themselves in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, after doing a stupendous amount of giving activities, any sportsmen may
"loss" is a noun. Did you mean the verb "lose" (= 'to lose')?
loss
energy
as well
as metal support.
For instance
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Virat
Possible spelling mistake found.
Koholi
, who is an Indian cricketer, have no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
knowledge of cricket,
even though
he has achieved
moderately
whatever he wants.
However
, he did not win the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
World
Cup- the most desired trophies which
are wanted
by all players. The reason is that he has lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
ability which neither gives him confidence nor the energy of the brain. Ergo, it is true that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
practice does not take a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
on the top ladder.

In conclusion
, although instinct capacity
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to achieve the target in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
, it
is said
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
also
say that acquiring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talent
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
by determination and practice could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to become a successful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
. From my perspective, if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
wants to become stars in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
, he or she
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
talent
, lots of exercise, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
You can never understand one language until you understand at least two.
Geoffrey Willans

IELTS essay Some people believe they should keep all the money they have earned and should not pay tax to the state v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
408 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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