Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The chart below shows the numbers of travelers at 2 train stations at different times of the day. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. v.1

The chart below shows the numbers of travelers at 2 train stations at different times of the day.
For centuries, humans have relied on the animals for their day to day living and have been used as a source of food and transport. Nowadays, one group of people argue that animals should be treated equally as humans. At the same time, the other one believes in conventional use and disregard the opinion of giving the animals some rights. It has been proven over time that the animals have been contributing, providing humans with all the facilities to live their life comfortability and with good health. For instance, animals’ skins are used in providing warm clothes and their meat and milk are used to provide energy for the human body. Furthermore, they have been used as a trustworthy source of transportation not only in the past, but even today, where the modern or gravel roads do not exist. Despite all these positive contributions by the animals to human society, it has been argued that these innocent creatures are being abused and are silent victims of human civilization. Looking at it with a balance set of eyes, these allegations do have weight. For example, animals cannot speak for themselves and even cannot get their message across. No doubt that these animals belong to a family and have their children, but they are still dragging to the butcher’s table without their consent to get themselves killed to satisfy the dominant group of social order. To conclude, one cannot deny that the animals are providing immense benefits to human society. Still, I believe that a mechanism should be property thought of that should give some rights and privileges to animals as well.
For centuries,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
have relied on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
for their
It appears that two hyphens are missing.
day to day
living and have been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
as a source of food and transport. Nowadays, one group of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
should
be treated
Use either "equally" or "as" on its own. When comparing two nouns, use "just as".
equally as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
. At the same time, the other one believes in conventional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
and disregard the opinion of giving the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
rights.

It has
been proven
over time that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
have been contributing, providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
with all the facilities to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
their life
Possible spelling mistake found.
comfortability
and with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
health.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals’
skins are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in providing warm clothes and their meat and milk are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to provide energy for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
body.
Furthermore
, they have been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
as a trustworthy source of transportation not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in the past,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
, where the modern or gravel roads do not exist.

Despite all these
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
contributions by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
society, it has
been argued
that these innocent creatures are
being abused
and are silent victims of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
civilization. Looking at it with a balance set of eyes, these allegations do have weight.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
cannot speak for themselves and even cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
their message across. No doubt that these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
belong to a family and have their children,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they are
still
dragging to the butcher’s table without their consent to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
themselves killed to satisfy the dominant group of social order.

To conclude
, one cannot deny that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
are providing immense benefits to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
society.
Still
, I believe that a mechanism should be property
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
of that should give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
rights and privileges to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
as well
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
You can never understand one language until you understand at least two.
Geoffrey Willans

IELTS essay The chart below shows the numbers of travelers at 2 train stations at different times of the day.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
270 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts