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The best way to help developing countries is to give them financial aid. Write an essay either agreeing or disagreeing with this statement. Suggest alternatives to this policy. v.1

The best way to help developing countries is to give them financial aid. Write an essay either agreeing or disagreeing with this statement. Suggest alternatives to this policy. v. 1
The effectiveness of monetary aid to help developing countries is a topic that is often argued about. While there may be contradicting views such a statement, i disagree with it being the best way to offer help. To start off, there's no guarantee that the financial aid is essentially being used for the country's benefit. In countries with deep rooted corruption, it’s common for such money to be re-routed to fill a politician's private pockets. Apart from this, mismanagement of funds due to inexperienced planning and execution can worsen the existing condition. For example, an upcoming nation might not have the experience or knowledge on how to build proper bridges that don’t break down during a natural calamity simply because they have not built one enough times to learn from their mistakes. Therefore, we need to look at other ways in order to truly offer help. There are a few alternatives to this model. Help can be provided by setting up companies in developing countries that generate income. This reduces dependence for further funds from outside. Material aid can also be offered instead of money. For instance, a country struggling to provide electricity to its cities can be given help in the form of functioning solar panel set ups and windmill installations by richer countries. Furthermore, free courses aimed at training skilled labour in recent advancements can make a world of a difference. Such a model is more likely to uplift a country than offering plain financial help. Therefore, to conclude, i would like to reiterate that offering monetary help is not always the best way to help a developing country. There are other effective ways as well.
The effectiveness of monetary aid to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
is a topic
that is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
argued about. While there may be contradicting views such a statement,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
disagree with it being the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
to offer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
off, there's no guarantee that the financial aid is
essentially
being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for the country's benefit. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
with
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
deep rooted
corruption, it’s common for such money to be re-routed to fill a politician's private pockets. Apart from this, mismanagement of funds due to inexperienced planning and execution can worsen the existing condition.
For example
, an upcoming nation might not have the experience or knowledge on how to build proper bridges that don’t break down during a natural calamity
simply
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have not built one
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
times to learn from their mistakes.
Therefore
, we need to look at other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
in order to
truly
offer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
.

There are a few alternatives to this model.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Help
can
be provided
by setting up
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
in developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
that generate income. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
dependence for
further
funds from outside. Material aid can
also
be offered
instead
of money.
For instance
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
struggling to provide electricity to its cities can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
in the form of functioning solar panel
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
set ups
and windmill installations by richer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
Furthermore
, free courses aimed at training skilled
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
in recent advancements can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a world of a difference. Such a model is more likely to uplift a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
than offering plain financial
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
.

Therefore
,
to conclude
,
Did you mean "I"?
i
would like to reiterate that offering monetary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
is not always the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
a developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. There are other effective
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
as well
.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
16Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay The best way to help developing countries is to give them financial aid. Write an essay either agreeing or disagreeing with this statement. Suggest alternatives to this policy. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
278 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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