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The bar chart below shows the main reasons for students choosing to study at a particular university in the UK in 1985 and 2005. v.1

The bar chart below shows the main reasons for students choosing to study at a particular university in the UK in 1985 and 2005. v. 1
The fact that environmental deterioration is caused due to human activities is a matter of great concern. This essay will first briefly describe that out of many activities, which contribute to environmental damage one of the main causes is the use of private vehicles by individuals, then suggest that it should be dealt with by conducting awareness campaigns, and promote usage of public transport among people. The quality of air in many cities is degrading at an exponential rate, which is a result of various factors. One major factor behind this is the increasing usage of self-owned vehicles among individuals, mainly due to the comfort it offers; however, it is worth considering that the emission through these vehicles is making the air more polluted every passing day. This is evident in large cities, for instance, Mumbai, in recent years, has seen an increase in the number of private vehicles and its impact is also visible in ever declining air quality index. Nevertheless, there are some workable solutions to the aforementioned problems. One such solution at the state level could be to run the awareness campaign informing people about the air quality trends for the last few years and explain how uses of public transport can contribute to maintaining good air quality. At the same time at the individual level, one should practice using shared transport and incorporate usage of biodegradable bags for routine shopping. For example, I personally carry cotton made carry bag all the time while going to shop outside, thus avoiding asking plastic bags from the vendor and reducing its uses. In conclusion, the growing popularity of private vehicles and the usage of plastic bags appear to be the most obvious reasons for this problem. However, it can be resolved through taking efforts at government and individual levels as mentioned.
The fact that environmental deterioration
is caused
due to human activities is a matter of great concern. This essay will
first
briefly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
that out of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
activities, which contribute to environmental damage one of the main causes is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
, then suggest that it should
be dealt
with by conducting awareness campaigns, and promote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
usage
of public transport among
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
cities is degrading at an exponential rate, which is a result of various factors. One major factor behind this is the increasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
usage
of self-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
owned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
,
mainly
due to the comfort it offers;
however
, it is worth considering that the emission through these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
is making the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
more polluted every passing day. This is evident in large cities,
for instance
, Mumbai, in recent years, has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
an increase in the number of private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
and its impact is
also
visible in ever declining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
index.

Nevertheless
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
workable
solutions to the aforementioned problems. One such solution at the state level could be to run the awareness campaign informing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
trends for the last few years and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
how
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
of public transport can contribute to maintaining
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
. At the same time at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
level, one should practice using shared transport and incorporate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
usage
of biodegradable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bags
for routine shopping.
For example
, I
personally
carry cotton made carry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bag
all the time while going to shop outside,
thus
avoiding asking plastic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bags
from the vendor and reducing its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
.

In conclusion
, the growing popularity of private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
usage
of plastic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bags
appear to be the most obvious reasons for this problem.
However
, it can
be resolved
through taking efforts at
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
levels as mentioned.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay The bar chart below shows the main reasons for students choosing to study at a particular university in the UK in 1985 and 2005. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
302 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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