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Television is dangerous because it destroys family life and any sense of community; instead of visiting people or talking with our family we just watch television. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and i v.8

Television is dangerous because it destroys family life and any sense of community; instead of visiting people or talking with our family we just watch television. with this opinion? 8
In today' s modern world, the presence of television and its effect on the life of mankind has become a major concern. Thus, it is claimed that television has demolished the connection between family members and reduced any kind of community sense. Personally, I completely agree with this statement and this essay will discuss several reasons explaining my opinion. To begin, it is undeniable that the constitution of family and how it was several decades ago have changed dramatically. While in 1990 the daily routine after work for adults and school for children was a family lunch when they were describing their morning, nowadays this is obsolete. All the members of the family are closed in their rooms without the need for communication with others watching the magic box named TV. Regretfully, our generation, those who were born at the end of the 20th century, has seen the change inside the family and it affected our lives in a negative way. To continue, there is not only an alteration in family life since TV was introduced globally but also in the human relationship with other members of our community. Furthermore, it is evident that there are not too many social events and that there is a declining rate of people participating in them. Undoubtedly, almost all of us prefer to spend our afternoons watching tv instead of visiting friends or going to events to discuss communal problems. From my perspective and opinion, this way of thinking and living will alienate the humankind. To conclude, there are several examples that show on a daily basis how dangerous is television and how destructive might be in the future. However, it is in our hand to reverse this situation which can have detrimental consequences.
In
Possible spelling mistake found.
today&
#039; s modern world, the presence of television and its effect on the life of mankind has become a major concern.
Thus
, it
is claimed
that television has demolished the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
connection between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
any kind of community sense.
Personally
, I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement and this essay will discuss several reasons explaining my opinion.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
, it is undeniable that the constitution of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and how it was several decades ago have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
dramatically
. While in 1990 the daily routine after work for adults and school for children was a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
lunch when they were describing their morning, nowadays this is obsolete. All the members of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
are closed
in their rooms without the need for communication with others watching the magic box named TV.
Regretfully
, our generation, those who
were born
at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the 20th century, has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
inside the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
and it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
way.

To continue, there is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
an alteration in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
life since TV
was introduced
globally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
in the human relationship with other members of our community.
Furthermore
, it is evident that there are not too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
social
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
and that there is a declining rate of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
participating in them.
Undoubtedly
, almost all of us prefer to spend our afternoons watching
Possible spelling mistake found.
tv
instead
of visiting friends or going to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
to discuss communal problems. From my perspective and opinion, this way of thinking and living will alienate the humankind.

To conclude
, there are several examples that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
on a daily basis how
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
is television and how destructive might be in the future.
However
, it is in our hand to reverse this situation which can have detrimental consequences.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Television is dangerous because it destroys family life and any sense of community; instead of visiting people or talking with our family we just watch television. with this opinion? 8

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
291 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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