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Task1- Which of the following three subjects would you choose to learn? Math, painting or science. Explain what you want to learn from this subject. Please include specific reasons and details in your response. v.1

Task1- Which of the following three subjects would you choose to learn? Math, painting or science. Explain what you want to learn from this subject. Please include specific reasons and details in your response. v. 1
Over the past decade, the world has seen an immense change in the people's attire. In the past, when traditional costumes were chosen by them now, however, they wear clothes that are similar across the globe. I believe it is a positive development as it not only unites multi-cultured people but also allow them to purchase these dresses at ease anywhere. Firstly, when citizens of different countries wear clothes of the same type, it gives them a sense of unity. To cite an example, these days most of the employees wear formal shirts and trousers at work. This lets them to collaborate with ease and concentrate more on their work. Instead, if each employee were to dress up according to one's culture, it would have hindered the togetherness in them. As a result, a uniform clothing can bring maximum efficiency out of workers. Secondly, if people clothe themselves in identical sort of garment across the world, it would readily be available everywhere. For example, youngsters prefer wearing jeans and top to their local costume. Since those casuals are common throughout the continents, it is not difficult to buy. In addition to the easy access, the clothes would be cheap too. Whereas, a countries traditional dress would not be available at ease in another nation and if at all present would be expensive. In conclusion, I think that dressing up in clothes of the same type across the world is a positive development because it integrates individuals of varied cultures and also provides an easy access to buy them at reasonable cost.
Over the past decade, the world has
seen
an immense
change
in the
people
's attire. In the past, when traditional costumes
were chosen
by them
now
,
however
, they wear
clothes
that are similar across the globe. I believe it is a
positive
development as it not
only
unites multi-cultured
people
but
also
allow
them to
purchase
these dresses at
ease
anywhere.

Firstly
, when citizens of
different
countries wear
clothes
of the same type, it gives them a sense of unity. To cite an example, these days most of the employees wear formal shirts and trousers at work. This
lets
them to collaborate with
ease
and concentrate more on their work.
Instead
, if each employee were to dress up according to one's culture, it would have hindered the togetherness in them.
As a result
, a uniform clothing can bring maximum efficiency out of workers.

Secondly
, if
people
clothe
themselves in identical sort of garment across the world, it would
readily
be available everywhere.
For example
, youngsters prefer wearing jeans and top to their local costume. Since those casuals are common throughout the continents, it is not difficult to
buy
.
In addition
to the easy access, the
clothes
would be
cheap
too. Whereas, a countries traditional dress would not be available at
ease
in another nation and if at all present would be expensive.

In conclusion
, I
think
that dressing up in
clothes
of the same type across the world is a
positive
development
because
it integrates individuals of varied cultures and
also
provides an easy access to
buy
them at reasonable cost.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Task1- Which of the following three subjects would you choose to learn? Math, painting or science. Explain what you want to learn from this subject. Please include specific reasons and details in your response. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
261 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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