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Task 2: Some people think the government funding should not be used for supporting art and culture, others think supporting cultural activities may be beneficial for the population and the culture. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. v.2

Task 2: Some people think the government funding should not be used for supporting art and culture, others think supporting cultural activities may be beneficial for the population and the culture. v. 2
At the present time, some people believe that government should invest in different sectors rather than spend money assisting artistic and cultural activities, however, population can also benefit significantly from cultural programs supported by authorities. In my opinion, while I agree with the first idea, I reckon that the culture should be paid attention. There are many reasons why modern sectors such as industry should be focused mainly by governments. Firstly, with the advances of science and technology, our lives are considerably ameliorated by modern machines. For instance, in Japan, the presence of a robot named ASIMO has ripple effects on investments of nations. Therefore, most governments spend a great amount of money on industry annually. Secondly, industry is regarded as a new way of assessment between economies of countries. Take an example, in most developing countries such as Vietnam, industrialization and modernization are important problems which are determined mainly by government. On the other hand, there are some arguments which indicate that the culture can be beneficial for society substantially. Many people believe that not only are art and culture conserved comprehensively, but they should also be assisted from government incentives. This can be explained by the necessity of culture in our lives. For instance, in Vietnam, government encourages students and children to take part in classes or seminars which introduce about different cultural identities. Furthermore, local committees also offer financial assistance to cultural preservations. In conclusion, personally, there are many advantages of enhancing sectors. Nevertheless, the culture should be maintained.
At the present time,
some
people
believe that
government
should invest in
different
sectors
rather
than spend money assisting artistic and
cultural
activities,
however
, population can
also
benefit
significantly
from
cultural
programs supported by authorities. In my opinion, while I
agree
with the
first
idea
, I reckon that the
culture
should
be paid
attention.

There are
many
reasons why modern sectors such as industry should
be focused
mainly
by
governments
.
Firstly
, with the advances of science and technology, our
lives
are
considerably
ameliorated by modern machines.
For instance
, in Japan, the presence of a robot named
ASIMO
has ripple effects on investments of nations.
Therefore
, most
governments
spend a great amount of money on industry
annually
.
Secondly
, industry
is regarded
as a new way of assessment between economies of countries. Take an example, in most
developing countries
such as Vietnam, industrialization and modernization are
important
problems which
are determined
mainly
by
government
.

On the other hand
, there are
some
arguments which indicate that the
culture
can be beneficial for society
substantially
.
Many
people
believe that not
only
are art and
culture
conserved
comprehensively
,
but
they should
also
be assisted
from
government
incentives. This can be
explained
by the necessity of
culture
in our
lives
.
For instance
, in Vietnam,
government
encourages students and children to
take part
in classes or seminars which introduce about
different
cultural
identities.

Furthermore
, local committees
also
offer financial assistance to
cultural
preservations.

In conclusion
,
personally
, there are
many
advantages of enhancing sectors.
Nevertheless
, the
culture
should
be maintained
.
19Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
14Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Task 2: Some people think the government funding should not be used for supporting art and culture, others think supporting cultural activities may be beneficial for the population and the culture. v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
252 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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