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TASK 2 (Academic and General Training) You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Many people have difficulty maintaining a healthy diet. What are the causes of this problem? How could it be solved? Write at least 250 words. v.1

TASK 2 (Academic and General Training) : Many people have difficulty maintaining a healthy diet. What are the causes of this problem? How could it be solved? v. 1
Generally, eating healthy is of paramount importance in the elimination of diseases and a happy lifestyle. Quite a number of people have challenges maintaining a healthy diet due to the competing demands on their limited financial resources and lack of knowledge on the consequences of unhealthy eating. A larger proportion of individuals do not commit to balanced diets due to budget constraints. Their other pressing essentials like school fees, accommodation and utilities have incapacitated them to buy every ingredients to a balanced meal. As a result, deficiency diseases like Kwashiokor and goita are the order of the day. Another cause why many people have difficulties in maintaining a healthy diet is lack of knowledge on what constitutes balanced diets and the adverse effects of not keeping to such. For example a survey which was carried out in our home land have proven that more than 55% of the population are unaware that they are eating unbalanced meals and how this have negatively affected their long living potential. Most importantly, to curb or assist the people having problems in keeping and maintaining a healthy diet, it is the responsibility of all stakeholders to come hand in hand. Firstly, government should improvise subsidies and grants to deserving families. As an example schemes such as 'Food for work' programs, where financially incapacitated persons will offer their time and labour in return for good humbers. This has been phenomenal in some countries where such a practice is prevalent. Another proposal would be to have awareness campaigns on how to eat healthy and effects of unhealthy eating explored. By so doing everyone may become conscious and start eating balanced diets. In conclusion, it is crucially beneficial to the whole society if everyone commits to maintaining a healthy diet. As such, government subsidies should be provided to deserving families and 'healthy eating' awareness campaigns initiated to ensure that everyone is made known of the importance of keeping to healthy diets.
Generally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
is of paramount importance in the elimination of diseases and a happy lifestyle. Quite a number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have challenges
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
maintaining
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
diet due to the competing demands on their limited financial resources and lack of knowledge on the consequences of unhealthy eating.

A larger proportion of individuals do not commit to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
balanced
diets due to budget constraints. Their other pressing essentials like school fees, accommodation and utilities have incapacitated them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
every
The noun should be probably in the singular form: "ingredient"?
ingredients
to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
balanced
meal.
As a result
, deficiency diseases like
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kwashiokor
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
goita
are the order of the day. Another cause why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have difficulties in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
maintaining
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
diet is lack of knowledge on what constitutes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
balanced
diets and the adverse effects of not keeping to such.
For example
a survey which
was carried
out in our home land have proven that more than 55% of the population are unaware that they are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
unbalanced meals and how
The verb 'have' is plural. Did you mean: "this has"? Did you use a verb instead of a noun?
this have
negatively
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
their long living potential.

Most
importantly
, to curb or assist the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
having problems in keeping and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
maintaining
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
diet, it is the responsibility of all stakeholders to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
hand in hand.
Firstly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should improvise subsidies and grants to deserving families. As an example schemes such as 'Food for work' programs, where
financially
incapacitated persons will offer their time and
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
in return for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
Possible spelling mistake found.
humbers
. This has been phenomenal in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries where such a practice is prevalent. Another proposal would be to have awareness campaigns on how to eat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
and effects of unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
explored. By
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
doing everyone may become conscious and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
balanced
diets.

In conclusion
, it is
crucially
beneficial to the whole society if everyone commits to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
maintaining
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
diet. As such,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
subsidies should
be provided
to deserving families and 'healthy eating' awareness campaigns initiated to ensure that everyone
is made
known of the importance of keeping to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
diets.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes
Language is the road map of a culture. It tells you where its people come from and where they are going.
Rita Mae Brown

IELTS essay TASK 2 (Academic and General Training) : Many people have difficulty maintaining a healthy diet. What are the causes of this problem? How could it be solved? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
324 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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