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Students should be taught academic knowledge so that they can pass exams, and skills such as cooking or dressing should not be taught. To what extent do you agree/disagree? v.10

Students should be taught academic knowledge so that they can pass exams, and skills such as cooking or dressing should not be taught. v. 10
Some people hold a belief that schools should be a place where students learn academic subjects to pass examinations rather than learn skills such as dressing and cookery. In my opinion, despite the significance of academic study and exams, students should also be taught fundamental life skills. On the one hand, studying academic comprehension is vital for students in many ways. First, examination results are essential for students’ academic record. With good results, they will have an advantage in the national high school exams in which their academic performance after many years of study is considered. Second, academic subjects equip students with fundamental knowledge that will be used in tertiary education. For example, most undergraduates in Vietnam are supposed to pass subjects, such as Microeconomics and Advanced Mathematics, which are comprised of mathematical understanding taught at high school. Without a deep understanding, students may fail the final exams and have to study these subjects again, which is time-consuming and costly. However, there are several reasons why students still need to learn practical skills. For instance, when college students live far from family, life skills such as cooking will be helpful for students will be able to prepare healthy and affordable meals on their own instead of eating out at restaurants. Attending skill-building classes at school is also an effective way for students to unwind after many hours of studying academic subjects. Through a wide range of activities, students are able to relax and as a result perform better in exams. In conclusion, I disagree that students should only research, academic subjects because both academic knowledge and practical skills are equally important and should be taught at school.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
hold a belief that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
should be a place where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
to pass examinations
rather
than learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
such as dressing and cookery. In my opinion, despite the significance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
study and exams,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should
also
be taught
fundamental life
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.

On the one hand, studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
comprehension is vital for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways.
First
, examination results are essential for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students’
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
record. With
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
results, they will have an advantage in the national high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
exams in which their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
performance after
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
years of study
is considered
. Second,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
equip
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
with fundamental knowledge that will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in tertiary education.
For example
, most undergraduates in Vietnam
are supposed
to pass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
, such as Microeconomics and Advanced Mathematics, which
are comprised
of mathematical understanding taught at high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. Without a deep understanding,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
may fail the final exams and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
study these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
again, which is time-consuming and costly.

However
, there are several reasons why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
still
need to learn practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
.
For instance
, when college
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
far from family, life
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
such as cooking will be helpful for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
will be able to prepare healthy and affordable meals on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
instead
of eating out at restaurants. Attending
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
-building classes at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is
also
an effective way for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to unwind after
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
hours of studying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
. Through a wide range of activities,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are able to relax and
as a result
perform better in exams.

In conclusion
, I disagree that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
research,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
academic
knowledge and practical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
are
equally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
and should
be taught
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Students should be taught academic knowledge so that they can pass exams, and skills such as cooking or dressing should not be taught. v. 10

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
277 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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