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Student should focus on learning in the classroom rather than show their status by wearing fashionable cloths Therefore all students have to wear school uniforms Do you agree or disagree with this statement v.2

Student should focus on learning in the classroom rather than show their status by wearing fashionable cloths Therefore all students have to wear school uniforms v. 2
It is true that there are schools where uniforms are made compulsory. This also implies to some institutions or colleges as well. In my opinion, school uniforms should be mandatory for everyone. This essay will focus on benefits of uniforms in schools. A good reason is that the uniforms in schools are made obligatory for the students to be in discipline which trains them to be in regulations and follow the rules. Discipline is a major practice of life which every individual should attain and this could be initiated from schools by teaching them. For example, there is no doubt that there are students who follow proper uniform leads to a discipline life by respecting others when they grow up. Another good reason to consider is that the uniform instructs us that there should not be any discrimination in schools irrespective of gender, where different uniforms are allotted to girls and boys. School is a place where discrimination is prohibited and therefore, schools should teach this to students in their early age. It is should be made necessary for parents as well to teach their children to not prejudice others. For example, there are students who bias other students in terms of their clothing, which not only embarrasses other students but they also feel low esteemed and they looses their self confidence. Therefore, schools do try to maintain students discipline but it is also a responsibility of parents to teach their children. Taking everything into consideration, school uniforms should be regulatory which educates children to respect their school, uniform and others as well and hence bigotry is removed if they are taught well.
It is true that there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uniforms
are made
compulsory. This
also
implies to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
institutions or colleges as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
. In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uniforms
should be mandatory for everyone. This essay will focus on benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uniforms
in schools.

A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
reason is that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uniforms
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
are made
obligatory for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to be in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
discipline
which trains them to be in regulations and follow the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Discipline
is a major practice of life which every individual should attain and this could
be initiated
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
by teaching them.
For example
, there is no doubt that there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who follow proper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uniform
leads to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
discipline
life by respecting others when they grow up.

Another
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
reason to consider is that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uniform
instructs us that there should not be any discrimination in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
irrespective of gender, where
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uniforms
are allotted
to girls and boys.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
School
is a place where discrimination
is prohibited
and
therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
should teach this to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in their early age. It
Did you mean "it"?
is
should
be made
necessary for parents as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
to teach their children to not prejudice others.
For example
, there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who bias
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in terms of their clothing, which not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
embarrasses
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they
also
feel low
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
esteemed and
they
The pronoun 'they' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: "loose"
looses
their
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
self confidence
.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
do try to maintain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
discipline
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is
also
a responsibility of parents to teach their children.

Taking everything into consideration,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uniforms
should be regulatory which educates children to respect their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uniform
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
and others
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
and
hence
bigotry
is removed
if they
are taught
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
well
.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
36Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay Student should focus on learning in the classroom rather than show their status by wearing fashionable cloths Therefore all students have to wear school uniforms v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
273 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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