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some people think that professionals, athletes make good role models for young people, while other believe that they do not. Discuss work views and give your opinion v.1

some people think that professionals, athletes make good role models for young people, while other believe that they do not. Discuss work views and give your opinion v. 1
There is no doubt that by the year 2000 there will be as many vehicles on the roads of the United Kingdom. Whereas many people prefer to use their own vehicles for safety and convenience purposes and others differ in the opinion that public transportation should be encouraged. However, I believe that opting for public transport is more simple and the safest way of travelling. On the one hand, people should use public transport which makes them more socialize and keep them away from loneliness. If you use public transport to travel to your work it will keep you more punctual at work. This is because, most of the metro rails, buses and other means of government transport run on a timely basis. For instance, if you have an interview or a meeting at a specific time then you might face an accident or traffic congestions on the road if you use your own vehicles, but if you use any of public transport you can avoid these delays and you can be on time. As a result, you can save up your time and money simultaneously. On the other hand, if you avoid using your cars and bikes on the roads this will result in less air population of the country and its citizens. Also, this can be more cost-saving on fuel and also less fuel consumption burden on the government. For example, you can buy a monthly or yearly pass in public transport for your travelling which can be far cheaper than comparing to your daily expenses of gasoline and oils. Additionally, you will feel less stressed and can utilize the time of travelling such as, reading newspapers, magazines or using social media on your mobile while doing some good walk. As a consequence, you will end up with a healthy lifestyle. In conclusion, Although cars are good for an emergency situation, but it can make you too lazy. However, In my opinion, public transport is much simpler and better in many ways as it is less time consuming and cheaper than compare to your own vehicles.
There is no doubt that by the year 2000 there will be as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
on the roads of the United Kingdom. Whereas
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
for safety and convenience purposes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
and others
differ in the opinion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
transportation should
be encouraged
.
However
, I believe that opting for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
is more simple and the safest way of travelling.

On the one hand,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them more socialize and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
them away from loneliness.
“If” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
If
you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
to travel to your work it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
you more punctual at work. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, most of the metro rails, buses and other means of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
run on a timely basis.
For instance
, if you have an interview or a meeting at a specific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
then you might face an accident or traffic congestions on the road if you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
if you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
any of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
you can avoid these delays and you can be on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
As a result
, you can save up your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and money
simultaneously
.

On the other hand
, if you avoid using your cars and bikes on the roads this will result in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
air population of the country and its citizens.
Also
, this can be more cost-saving on fuel and
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
fuel consumption burden on the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
.
For example
, you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
a monthly or yearly pass in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
for your travelling which can be far cheaper than comparing to your daily expenses of gasoline and oils.
Additionally
, you will feel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
and can utilize the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
of travelling such as, reading newspapers, magazines or using social media on your mobile while doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
walk. As a consequence, you will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up with a healthy lifestyle.

In conclusion
, Although cars are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for an emergency situation,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
you
Did you mean "to"?
too
lazy.
However
, In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
is much simpler and better in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways as it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
time consuming
and cheaper than compare to your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vehicles
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay some people think that professionals, athletes make good role models for young people, while other believe that they do not. Discuss work views and give your opinion v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
348 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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