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Stress-related illnesses are becoming increasingly common. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest? v.4

Stress-related illnesses are becoming increasingly common. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest? v. 4
People are suffering from stress-related illness, since mankind came into existence. Whether it's the stress due to work or stress due to their love life. However, the number of people suffering from depression is increasing day by day. This essay will discuss the main cause of stress and some suggestions that will help us in tackling this problem. Sometime due to heavy workload people suffer from depression, anxiety. In India, most of the people work overtime in order to save their job. There are no policies for the private sector employees and the employer treat them as robots, as a result of which the employees are always stressed. Love is also a main reason for stress related illness. For instance, many youngsters who lost the love of their life, often undergo depression. It is in the human nature, we cannot easily overcome the situation of breakups. We can get rid of depression, anxiety by practising meditation. Yoga and meditation are the cure of all illnesses, whether it is a physical or mental illness. Even though due to our hectic schedule we are not able to exercise, but a ten minutes of mediation everyday can cause miracles. Parents should talk to their children whenever they undergo such conditions, as they understand their child more than anyone else. In conclusion, there is no denying the fact that stress-related illnesses are increasing. Our lifestyle and over thinking of different things is the main reason for this. However, it does not matter how big the problem is, there is always a solution. We should live our life with a positive thinking and accept the changes happening in our lives.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are suffering from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
-related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
illness
, since mankind came into existence. Whether it's the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stress
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to work or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stress
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
life.
However
, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
suffering from depression is increasing day by day. This essay will discuss the main cause of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stress
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
suggestions that will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us in tackling this problem.

Sometime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to heavy workload
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
suffer from depression, anxiety. In India, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
work overtime in order to save their job. There are no policies for the private sector employees and the employer treat them as robots,
as a result
of which the employees are always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Love
is
also
a main reason for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stress
related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
illness
.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
youngsters who lost the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
of their life,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
undergo depression. It is in the human nature, we cannot
easily
overcome the situation of breakups.

We can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
rid of depression, anxiety by
Possible spelling mistake. 'practising' is British English.
practising
meditation. Yoga and meditation are the cure of all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
illnesses
, whether it is a physical or mental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
illness
.
Even though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to our hectic schedule we are not able to exercise,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
a ten minutes of mediation
'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean "every day"?
everyday
can cause miracles. Parents should talk to their children whenever they undergo such conditions, as they understand their child more than anyone else.

In conclusion
, there is no denying the fact that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
-related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
illnesses
are increasing. Our lifestyle and over thinking of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
things is the main reason for this.
However
, it does not matter how
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
the problem is, there is always a solution. We should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
our life with a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
thinking and accept the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
happening in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
Speak a new language so that the world will be a new world.
Rumi

IELTS essay Stress-related illnesses are becoming increasingly common. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest? v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
275 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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