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Starting this year, the university dining hall will be transformed into The Campus Dining Club for one week at the end of each semester. During the last week of each semester, the dining hall will feature special meals prepared by the university’s culin v.1

Starting this year, the university dining hall will be transformed into The Campus Dining Club for one week at the end of each semester. During the last week of each semester, the dining hall will feature special meals prepared by the university’s culin v. 1
The way people treat the elderly varies depending on the culture and tradition within a society. Some cultures tell children to look up their older generations as they are more experienced and knowledgeable, while others put younger generations in the centre of attention. This essay will discuss both views and explain why young people should respect and follow old people. Youngsters can learn a lot from their seniors as they have an advanced level of knowledge and skills, which were learnt from their life and work experiences. It is true that in some careers such as medicine and nursing, some people still practice after the retirement age. Younger generations appreciate their expertise in the process of learning new skills and knowledge. Even though the advancement of technology and science has changed the way of medical practice to a greater extent, the philosophy of caring others is unchanged. For these reasons, I believe that the older generation is highly valued and young people should appreciate the advice from them to improve themselves. On the other hand, it is true that elders are overvalued in some cases. While their contributions to the society should be acknowledged, because the world would not have been the same without their hard work in the past, the focus should be our children as they are our future. In actual fact, their knowledge and the way of thinking are sometimes outdated. For example, Women used to stay at home, taking care of house chores in the past. This practice has been changed over the years and it is more common for females to pursue careers like men do. If the elderly advise children to follow the normal practice of their generation, it might not be applicable to this modern world. Thus, their advice is not always valuable. To conclude, while their way of thinking can be outdated sometimes, the value of their skills and knowledge in some fields is highly appreciated. In my opinion, young people can learn from the elderly in many ways, therefore they should respect and follow their advice to improve themselves.
The way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
treat the elderly varies depending on the culture and tradition within a society.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
cultures
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
children to look up their older generations as they are more experienced and knowledgeable, while others put younger generations in the
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
of attention.

This essay will discuss both views and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
why young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should respect and follow
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

Youngsters can learn a lot from their seniors as they have an advanced level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, which were
Possible spelling mistake. 'learnt' is British English.
learnt
from their life and work experiences. It is true that in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
careers such as medicine and nursing,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
still
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practice
after the retirement age. Younger generations appreciate their expertise in the process of learning new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
.
Even though
the advancement of technology and science has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
the way of medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practice
to a greater extent, the philosophy of caring others
is unchanged
. For these reasons, I believe that the older generation is
highly
valued and young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should appreciate the advice from them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
themselves.

On the other hand
, it is true that elders
are overvalued
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases. While their contributions to the society should
be acknowledged
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the world would not have been the same without their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work in the past, the focus should be our children as they are our future. In actual fact, their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
and the way of thinking are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
outdated.
For example
, Women
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to stay at home, taking care of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
chores in the past. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practice
has been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
over the years and it is more common for females to pursue careers like
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
do. If the elderly advise children to follow the normal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practice
of their generation, it might not be applicable to this modern world.
Thus
, their advice is not always valuable.

To conclude
, while their way of thinking can
be outdated
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
, the value of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
fields is
highly
appreciated. In my opinion, young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can learn from the elderly in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways,
therefore
they should respect and follow their advice to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
themselves.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
One should not aim at being possible to understand but at being impossible to misunderstand.
Marcus Fabius Quintilian

IELTS essay Starting this year, the university dining hall will be transformed into The Campus Dining Club for one week at the end of each semester. During the last week of each semester, the dining hall will feature special meals prepared by the university’s culin v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
348 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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