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Some think it is right to give beggars money on the street while others think it is wrong to do it. What is your stance on this topic? Be sure to include specific details and examples in your response. v. 1

These days, most kids get obese because of lack of activity and a sedentary lifestyle. It is suggested that schools should increase the duration of games and physical activities for the kids, in order to resolve this issue. I strongly advocate this approach of schools taking this initiative. In this essay we will discuss this in detail and will suggest two other possible solutions for this problem. Will schools be the best to tackle this issue? I believe, yes, they will. Since, in modern education system, students spend most of their day in schools, therefore, broadening sports and workout slot in the curriculum will ascertain a healthy lifestyle within the school community. Furthermore, it can make many students interested in various sports as they get more time to learn and practice it. To illustrate, a study by child psychology department of UK states that kids who play sports in their school are expected to lead a perfectly healthy life than those who do not. As a result, education system integrating this activity learning in their syllabus will certainly ensure a counterattack to overweight issues by children. Healthy mind stays in a healthy body. Hence, it becomes the responsibility of the parents to ensure that they educate their offspring to lead an active life by providing them with healthy eating options, meanwhile, themselves being a role model for their offspring by pursuing a robust living style. To illustrate, it is generally seen that fit parents have active kids. In addition to this, the government should also intervene to make the nation flourish. The law making body should increase the taxes on fast food, which is getting really famous among these adolescents and teenagers. This step will curb the excess sale of such processed food. Unless, the adults and the union together do not stand up for a strong future, the next generation will not learn the way away from obesity. To recapitulate, having mulled over above information and deliberating all the facts, it can be deducted that the increased physical activities by the school will be propitious for overcoming the problem in today's kids. Also, guardians and the legislation should take their stand to counter attack this obstacle, and assure a safe and sound future.

IELTS essay Some think it is right to give beggars money on the street while others think it is wrong to do it. What is your stance on this topic? Be sure to include specific details and examples in your response. v.1

These days, most
kids
get
obese
because
of lack of
activity
and a sedentary lifestyle. It
is suggested
that
schools
should increase the duration of games and physical
activities
for the
kids
, in order to resolve this issue. I
strongly
advocate this approach of
schools
taking this initiative. In this essay we will discuss this in detail and will suggest two other possible solutions for this problem. Will
schools
be the best to tackle this issue? I believe, yes, they will. Since, in modern education system, students spend most of their day in
schools
,
therefore
, broadening sports and workout slot in the curriculum will ascertain a
healthy
lifestyle within the
school
community.
Furthermore
, it can
make
many
students interested in various sports as they
get
more time to learn and practice it. To illustrate, a study by child psychology department of UK states that
kids
who play sports in their
school
are
expected
to lead a
perfectly
healthy
life than those who do not.
As a result
, education system integrating this
activity
learning in their syllabus will
certainly
ensure a counterattack to overweight issues by children. Healthy mind stays in a
healthy
body.
Hence
, it becomes the responsibility of the parents to ensure that they educate their offspring to lead an active life by providing them with
healthy
eating options, meanwhile, themselves being a role model for their offspring by pursuing a robust living style. To illustrate, it is
generally
seen
that fit parents have active
kids
.
In addition
to this, the
government
should
also
intervene to
make
the nation flourish. The law making body should increase the taxes on
fast
food, which is getting
really
famous
among these adolescents and
teenagers
. This step will curb the excess sale of such processed food. Unless, the adults and the union together do not stand up for a strong future, the
next
generation will not learn the way away from obesity. To recapitulate, having mulled over above information and deliberating all the facts, it can
be deducted
that the increased physical
activities
by the
school
will be propitious for overcoming the problem in
today
's
kids
.
Also
, guardians and the legislation should take their stand to counter attack this obstacle, and assure a safe and sound future.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
20Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
Essay
4 paragraphs
374 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resources: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Band score ≥ 7
  • Band score ≤ 6
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