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Some people think that giving beggars money on the street is wrong, while others think it's right. Which idea do you support? Be sure to use specific details and examples to support your opinion. v. 2

We all feel pity when we see beggars requesting spare change on the streets. In my opinion, however, it is incorrect to give in to these feelings and supply these people with money. Ultimately, the cash could be better used for other purposes. In the first place, the money given to beggars can be better spent on other charities. For example, five dollars may purchase a slice of pizza in a developed country. In the developing world, however, that same five dollars could purchase life-saving products, such as nets to ward off malaria, or nutrients to aid starving children. Rather than giving money to local beggars, it would be more just to save spare change during the year, eventually donating all of it to the developing world. That is where it can do the maximum amount of good. It is random that some people are close neighbors and others live far away. We owe moral obligations to people everywhere, however, because we are all human beings. For this reason, it is wrong to prefer helping local beggars rather than distant, starving strangers. We should always spend our money where it does the most good to the most people. At the same time, giving money to beggars can encourage bad practices. It is uncertain how the money might be used. For example, it might be used to purchase drugs or alcohol. These substances will not help the beggar to improve his or her position in life. Moreover, by giving beggars money, you are perhaps not really helping them in the long run. There is an old saying that you can feed a man for one day by giving him a fish, but you can feed him for a lifetime by teaching him to fish. The reason this is relevant is that it is better to encourage beggars to seek jobs rather than supporting their state of unemployment. Of course, some beggars are unable to find work and need help in the short term. But it is impossible to tell the difference between people who sincerely need the money and those who will misuse it, or are uninterested in finding work. For this reason, it is better to allow social services and unemployment agencies to help the needy, and to spend excess money on charities in the developing world.

IELTS essay Some people think that giving beggars money on the street is wrong, while others think it's right. Which idea do you support? Be sure to use specific details and examples to support your opinion. v.2

We all feel pity when we
see
beggars
requesting spare
change
on the streets. In my opinion,
however
, it is incorrect to give in to these feelings and supply these
people
with
money
.
Ultimately
, the cash could be
better
used
for other purposes. In the
first
place, the
money
given
to
beggars
can be
better
spent on other charities.
For example
, five dollars may
purchase
a slice of pizza in a
developed country
. In the developing world,
however
, that same five dollars could
purchase
life-saving products, such as nets to ward off malaria, or nutrients to aid starving children.
Rather
than
giving
money
to local
beggars
, it would be more
just
to save spare
change
during the year,
eventually
donating all of it to the developing world.
That is
where it can do the maximum amount of
good
. It is random that
some
people
are close neighbors
and others
live
far away. We owe moral obligations to
people
everywhere,
however
,
because
we are all human beings.
For this reason
, it is
wrong
to prefer helping local
beggars
rather
than distant, starving strangers. We should always spend our
money
where it does the most
good
to the most
people
. At the same time,
giving
money
to
beggars
can encourage
bad
practices. It is uncertain how the
money
might be
used
.
For example
, it might be
used
to
purchase
drugs or alcohol. These substances will not
help
the
beggar
to
improve
his or her
position in life.
Moreover
, by
giving
beggars
money
, you are perhaps not
really
helping them in the long run. There is an
old
saying that you can feed a
man
for one day by
giving
him a fish,
but
you can feed him for a lifetime by teaching him to fish. The reason this is relevant is that it is
better
to encourage
beggars
to seek jobs
rather
than supporting their state of unemployment.
Of course
,
some
beggars
are unable to find work and need
help
in the short term.
But
it is impossible to
tell
the difference between
people
who
sincerely
need the
money
and those who will misuse it, or
are uninterested
in finding work.
For this reason
, it is
better
to
allow
social services and unemployment agencies to
help
the needy, and to spend excess
money
on charities in the developing world.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
30Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
Essay
4 paragraphs
387 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resources: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Band score ≥ 7
  • Band score ≤ 6
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