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Some say that rich countries should help poor countries with food and education. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include examples from your experience. v.6

Some say that rich countries should help poor countries with food and education. v. 6
Nowadays, it has been observed that developed nations provide their help to the developing or underdeveloped countries. Actually, in my opinion, this is a positive sign and I am fully supporting with this attitude of the world. The following essay state points to support my opinion. Firstly, for expediting the growth of a region, the living standard of the population has a great influence. The citizen's well-being is mainly depends on the food and the education. Here, if the rich countries can help them by providing the better learning infrastructure, which results to get better classes, in turn, they can develop as a good citizen and can start contributing the nation's growth. As a result, everyone can able to contribute to the world's development. For instance, India started helping the Africa by giving budget to develop the infrastructure, and now Africa's living standard increased and started contributing their knowledge towards space missions. Secondly, helping each other is a way to reduce the gap and can become one. Helping is a sign of unity. If a well settled country announce its help to an underdeveloped state, it lights the path for empathy. Receiving a hand to escape from poverty and illiteracy, gradually turns the poor country to increasing the level in the world. Furthermore, that will reduce the separation between the two slabs. For example, the USA, started helping the India in the field of industry and now India reaches in a better height with respect of the industrial growth. The separation between the USA and India in this field is reduced. In conclusion, in my view, providng helping hands to other nations is always good as it ultimately reduces the distinction between the countries and also help to become united.
Nowadays, it has
been observed
that developed nations provide their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to the developing or underdeveloped
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. Actually, in my opinion, this is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
sign and
I am
fully
supporting with this attitude of the world. The following essay state points to support my opinion.

Firstly
, for expediting the growth of a region, the living standard of the population has a great influence. The citizen's well-being is
mainly
depends on the food and the education. Here, if the rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them by providing the better learning infrastructure, which results to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
better classes, in turn, they can develop as a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
citizen and can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
contributing the nation's growth.
As a result
, everyone
Please check whether one of these words is redundant.
can able to
contribute to the world's development.
For instance
, India
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
helping the Africa by giving budget to develop the infrastructure, and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
Africa's living standard increased and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
contributing their knowledge towards space missions.

Secondly
, helping each other is a way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the gap and can become one. Helping is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
of unity. If a well settled
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
announce its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to an underdeveloped state, it lights the path for empathy. Receiving a hand to escape from poverty and illiteracy,
gradually
turns the poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
to increasing the level in the world.
Furthermore
, that will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the separation between the two slabs.
For example
, the USA,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
helping the India in the field of industry and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
India reaches in a better height with respect of the industrial growth. The separation between the USA and India in this field is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
.

In conclusion
, in my view,
Possible spelling mistake found.
providng
helping hands to other nations is always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
as it
ultimately
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
the distinction between the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
and
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
to become united.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some say that rich countries should help poor countries with food and education. v. 6

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
290 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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