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Some people think the cheap air flight gives ordinary people more freedom. However, others think that cheap air flights should be banned because it pollutes the air and brings many problems. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.3

Some people think the cheap air flight gives ordinary people more freedom. However, others think that cheap air flights should be banned because it pollutes the air and brings many problems. v. 3
Nowadays, with the technological advancement and globalization, cheap air travel has become increasingly popular due to being considered advantageous; however, some people argue that inexpensive flights should be banned because of its negative impacts on the environment. In this essay, I will examine both views and express my opinion. On the one hand, the low-cost airline is advantageous for several reasons. First of all, it makes long-distance travel affordable for middle-class people. Thanks to reasonably priced charges, ordinary people now have more opportunities to enjoy their holidays or do their business trips abroad than ever before. In terms of convenience, the low-price airline is often the fastest way to travel. Compared to the past, modern people can save plenty of time owing to the frequency and the quicks of flights. These reasons have contributed significantly to helping people feel free when traveling to different places. Accordingly, it promotes the development of the tourism industry. On the other hand, air-transportation is regarded as a key factor that causes environmental problems, resulting in some people say it had better be restricted. To put it more simply, an airplane emits a considerable amount of exhaust fumes, especially carbon dioxide during a flight. Therefore, from the environmental point of view, with a great number of planes flying every day from all over the world, it will cause serious air pollution, resulting in the greenhouse effect. Moreover, it also leads to natural resource depletion owing to consuming a large amount of gasoline and fuels. Considering both views and arguments, it seems more likely to me that air travel should not be banned because of its noteworthy benefits and its important role in the global industry. Nevertheless, science must continue research on finding an alternative fuel for the airplanes to reduce the emission from each flight.
Nowadays, with the technological advancement and globalization,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
has become
increasingly
popular due to
being considered
advantageous;
however
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argue that inexpensive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
flights
should
be banned
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of its
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts on the environment. In this essay, I will examine both views and express my opinion.

On the one hand, the low-cost airline is advantageous for several reasons.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
long-distance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
affordable for middle-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Thanks to
reasonably
priced charges, ordinary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
have more opportunities to enjoy their holidays or do their business trips abroad than ever
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
. In terms of convenience, the low-price airline is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
the fastest way to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
. Compared to the past, modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can save
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of time owing to the frequency and the
Possible spelling mistake found.
quicks
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
flights
. These reasons have contributed
significantly
to helping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
feel free when traveling to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
places.
Accordingly
, it promotes the development of the tourism industry.

On the other hand
, air-transportation
is regarded
as a key factor that causes environmental problems, resulting in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
say it had better
be restricted
. To put it more
simply
, an airplane emits a considerable amount of exhaust fumes,
especially
carbon dioxide during a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
flight
.
Therefore
, from the environmental point of view, with a great number of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
planes
flying every day from all over the world, it will cause serious air pollution, resulting in the greenhouse effect.
Moreover
, it
also
leads to natural resource depletion owing to consuming a large amount of gasoline and fuels.

Considering both views and arguments, it seems more likely to me that air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
travel
should not
be banned
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of its noteworthy benefits and its
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in the global industry.
Nevertheless
, science
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
continue research on finding an alternative fuel for the airplanes to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the emission from each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
flight
.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
14Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
A special kind of beauty exists which is born in language, of language, and for language.
Gaston Bachelard

IELTS essay Some people think the cheap air flight gives ordinary people more freedom. However, others think that cheap air flights should be banned because it pollutes the air and brings many problems. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
300 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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