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Some people think that work is the most important thing of people’s life. Without the success of career, life become meaningless. To what extent do you agree or disagree? You should write at least 250 words v.3

Some people think that work is the most important thing of people’s life. Without the success of career, life become meaningless. v. 3
Occupation is a constant or most engagement of a person. It prospect largely define a man's life worth. Success in a career is not limited to monetary rewards alone, but includes all other benefits such as self actualization and increase in status within the occupation. I agree with the opinion that a career is important to and likewise determines a man's life. This essay discusses some reasons why work is important to man's definition of life. A job defines a person because it involves the major activities during existence. These activities can be done with joy or sadness depending on what motivates the individual. When successful, the job makes meaning and thus sees a reason to live and continue it, not minding the stress involved in achieving the task(s). For instance, an architect whom the society acknowledges his amazing designs has a succeeded career. Living is meaningful to him because his works satisfy his customers. The impact of a person's activity defines what existence means to them and also to the people around them. Are the results positive or negative? An occupation making positive influence boost moral of existence, even if the reward is not big. A teacher's words of advice to his students will go a long way in the students' lives. If adopted by the students, the teacher has succeeded in the job and sees a relevant reason for living. Money is believed to solve most problems. An occupation that provides enough funds to cater for need, gives comfort and defines success. The level of comfort with people determines what living means to them. Lack of basic needs despite hard work is discouraging and can make a man assume the life is meaningless. In conclusion, work success rate can be used to define what life implies. A work that encourage to do more, will most likely translate to a success which in turn implies a life worth living.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Occupation
is a constant or most engagement of a person. It
Did you mean "prospects"?
prospect
largely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
define
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
worth.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Success
in a career is not limited to monetary rewards alone,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
includes all other benefits such as self actualization and increase in status within the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
occupation
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the opinion that a career is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to and
likewise
determines a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. This essay discusses
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
's definition of life.

A job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
defines
a person
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it involves the major activities during existence. These activities can
be done
with joy or sadness depending on what motivates the individual. When successful, the job
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
meaning and
thus
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sees
a reason to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
and continue it, not minding the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
involved in achieving the task(s).
For instance
, an architect whom the society acknowledges his amazing designs has a succeeded career. Living is meaningful to him
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
his works satisfy his customers. The impact of a person's activity
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
defines
what existence means to them and
also
to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
around them. Are the results
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
? An
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
occupation
making
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
influence boost moral of existence, even if the reward is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
. A teacher's words of advice to his students will go a long way in the students'
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. If adopted by the students, the teacher has succeeded in the job and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sees
a relevant reason for living.

Money
is believed
to solve most problems. An
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
occupation
that provides
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
funds to cater for need, gives comfort and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
defines
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
. The level of comfort with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
determines
what living means to them. Lack of basic needs despite
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is discouraging and can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
assume the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is meaningless.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
rate can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
define
what
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
implies. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
that encourage to do more, will most likely translate to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
which in turn implies a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
worth living.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
A man who knows two languages is worth two men.
French Proverb

IELTS essay Some people think that work is the most important thing of people’s life. Without the success of career, life become meaningless. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
320 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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