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Some people think that work is the most important thing of people’s life. Without the success of career, life become meaningless. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that work is the most important thing of people's life. Without the success of career, life will become meaningless. v. 2
I disagree with the view that an individual’s profession is of primary importance of his life. My view is based on multiple factors which I will be putting across in this essay. Firstly, happiness and peace are important in a life’s journey to consider it worthwhile. While there is an importance of academic and professional success to achieve a meaning in life, these are not the only avenues of achieving satisfaction of a life well lived. It is more valuable to experience the joys of living with our family and the companionship of friends that makes one’s path enjoyable. Secondly, the pressure of work and studies add to the stress causing an individual to lose his focus on his ambition & targets that he wants to reach. It is imperative then, to manage this stress which can become toxic by taking time out of occupational activities & detoxicate the mind with exercise, appreciating art & listening to music. Once the brain is rejuvenated, it becomes easier to focus back on the aims & the brain becomes more efficient. Lastly, we as humans have an important social responsibility to make our offspring better human beings. Our children are our future & it will be bright only when the right set of values are passed to them. This involves spending time to guide them to follow the right pathway of achieving their success without hurting the world ecosystem of all living beings. To conclude, while the definition of a life’s meaning is diverse and differs from a person to person, there are multiple ways apart from work which make our lives more meaningful.
I disagree with the view that an individual’s profession is of primary importance of his
life
. My view
is based
on multiple factors which I will be putting across in this essay.

Firstly
, happiness and peace are
important
in a
life’s
journey to consider it worthwhile. While there is an importance of academic and professional success to achieve a meaning in
life
, these are not the
only
avenues of achieving satisfaction of a
life
well
lived
. It is more valuable to experience the joys of living with our family and the companionship of friends that
makes
one’s path enjoyable.

Secondly
, the pressure of work and studies
add
to the
stress
causing an individual to lose his focus on his ambition & targets that he wants to reach. It is imperative then, to manage this
stress
which can become toxic by taking time out of occupational activities &
detoxicate
the mind with exercise, appreciating art & listening to music. Once the brain
is rejuvenated
, it becomes easier to focus back on the aims & the brain becomes more efficient.

Lastly
, we as humans have an
important
social responsibility to
make
our offspring better human beings. Our children are our future & it will be bright
only
when the right set of values
are passed
to them. This involves spending time to guide them to follow the right pathway of achieving their success without hurting the world ecosystem of all living beings.

To conclude
, while the definition of a
life’s
meaning is diverse and differs from a person to person, there are multiple ways apart from work which
make
our
lives
more meaningful.
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IELTS essay Some people think that work is the most important thing of people’s life. Without the success of career, life become meaningless.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
271 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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