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Some people think that we can use as much fresh water as we want. Others think that fresh water supply should be controlled strictly by governments as the sources are limited. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.3

Some people think that we can use as much fresh water as we want. Others think that fresh water supply should be controlled strictly by governments as the sources are limited. v. 3
Water is the most common liquid found on earth. While most part of our planet is covered with water, fresh water that can be used for drinking, cooking and other activities is quite less. Despite the aforementioned fact, some people still give themselves the right to use fresh water in an unrestricted way. Others oppose that it is necessary for the authorities to strictly control the amount of water usage. From my perspective, I side the latter opinion; however, this essay will still discuss both points of view. Although it is certain that humanities will have enough fresh water for at least the next 100 years, but still, it is a limited resource. If people freely allow themselves to use clean water even in an extravagant way, it is obviously that they will put their next generations under a risk of having no fresh water to use. Otherwise, I agree that water resource should be accessible for every one’s needs, especially for agriculture and industries, they all need a large supply of water for producing. However, there should be a consideration in using water for any purposes. They can take simple actions to consume it more efficiently, like turning off taps whenever they are brushing or shaving, and finding opportunities to conserve water in their home. The main purpose of controlling the water usage after all is to ensure that there are no knock-on effects on our next generations and there is always available water for everybody. So, in my opinion, the government plays an important role in raising awareness and encouraging a revelation in public. They can educate their citizens of how vital is our action today can effect on the future or basically, passing water-saving ordinances. In conclusion, no one can deny the importance of water, especially fresh water in our daily lives. Individual responsibility as well as the government’s role should be considered to conserve water resource. Otherwise, water still can be accessible to everyone’s needs, but not for waste.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Water
is the most common liquid found on earth. While most part of our planet
is covered
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
that can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for drinking, cooking and other activities is quite less. Despite the aforementioned fact,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
still
give themselves the right to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
Consider replacing "in an unrestricted way" with the adverb for "unrestricted"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
in an unrestricted way
. Others oppose that it is necessary for the authorities to
strictly
control the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
usage. From my perspective, I side the latter opinion;
however
, this essay will
still
discuss both points of view.

Although it is certain that humanities will have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
for at least the
next
100 years,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
still
, it is a limited resource. If
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
freely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
themselves to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
clean
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
even
Consider replacing "in an extravagant way" with the adverb for "extravagant"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
in an extravagant way
, it is
obviously
that they will put their
next
generations under a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of having no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
.
Otherwise
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
resource should be accessible for every one’s needs,
especially
for agriculture and industries, they all need a large supply of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
for producing.
However
, there should be a consideration in using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
for any purposes. They can take simple actions to consume it more
efficiently
, like turning off taps whenever they are brushing or shaving, and finding opportunities to conserve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
in their home.

The main purpose of controlling the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
usage
after all
is to ensure that there are no knock-on effects on our
next
generations and there is always available
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
for everybody.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, in my opinion, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in raising awareness and encouraging a revelation in public. They can educate their citizens of how vital is our action
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
can effect on the future or
basically
, passing water-saving ordinances.

In conclusion
, no one can deny the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
,
especially
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
in our daily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. Individual responsibility
as well
as the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
’s role should
be considered
to conserve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
resource.
Otherwise
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
water
still
can be accessible to everyone’s needs,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not for waste.
16Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
23Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
With languages, you are at home anywhere.
Edward De Waal

IELTS essay Some people think that we can use as much fresh water as we want. Others think that fresh water supply should be controlled strictly by governments as the sources are limited. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
333 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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