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Some people think that they can make as much noise as they want, while others think that the amount of noise people make should be strictly controlled. Discuss both views and include your own opinion and examples. v.1

Some people think that they can make as much noise as they want, while others think that the amount of noise people make should be strictly controlled. v. 1
It is unfortunately the case that in any society we can find a number of people who do not respect to the social rights of others. One of the most disturbing cases is making noise either in public or people's private life. While the majority of people believe that the amount of noise produced by individuals must be restricted, there are still people who think that they have freedom to make noise regardless of considering other's life. In this essay, I will explain my point of view by examining both sides of the argument. Some people think that they should not take any responsibility related to limiting or decreasing the noise made by them. They claim that controlling the amount of the noise by rules and regulations not only invades their personal privacy, but it violates their social freedom. For example, in their view, listening to music loudly or hosting night parties in their own apartments would be considered as their basic human rights of being happy. There is, however, a strong argument that it is the responsibility of all members of a society to respect others' social life. Most people object to disrupting other's life by making unlimited noises. They believe that making noise should be controlled as much as possible when it creates disturbance for others by regulating strict rules. A common example here is to prohibit talking over cell phones loudly in the public such as in a subway which is clearly creating disturbance for people who are near the person while it has been frequently happening. In my view, any type of activity that creates disturbance for citizens' life must be controlled, and noise is no exception. Although it is beyond the power of governments to control all disturbing noises in the whole society, it seems to be possible that making some avoidable noises is banned in certain places such as near hospitals.
It is unfortunately the case that in any society we can find a number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who do not respect to the social rights of others. One of the most disturbing cases is making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
noise
either in public or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. While the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
noise
produced by individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be restricted
, there are
still
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that they have freedom to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
noise
regardless of considering other's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. In this essay, I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
my point of view by examining both sides of the argument.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that they should not take any responsibility related to limiting or decreasing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
noise
made by them. They claim that controlling the amount of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
noise
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
invades their personal privacy,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it violates their social freedom.
For example
, in their view, listening to music
loudly
or hosting night parties in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
apartments would
be considered
as their basic human rights of being happy.

There is,
however
, a strong argument that it is the responsibility of all members of a society to respect others' social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. Most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
object to disrupting other's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
by making unlimited
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
noises
. They believe that making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
noise
should
be controlled
as much as possible when it creates disturbance for others by regulating strict
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
. A common example here is to prohibit talking over cell phones
loudly
in the public such as in a subway which is
clearly
creating disturbance for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are near the person while it has been
frequently
happening.

In my view, any type of activity that creates disturbance for citizens'
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be controlled
, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
noise
is no exception. Although it is beyond the power of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
to control all disturbing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
noises
in the whole society, it seems to be possible that making
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
avoidable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
noises
is banned
in certain places such as near hospitals.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
21Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
Language comes first. It’s not that language grows out of consciousness, if you haven’t got language, you can’t be conscious.
Alan Moore

IELTS essay Some people think that they can make as much noise as they want, while others think that the amount of noise people make should be strictly controlled. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
317 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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