Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people think that universities should provide graduates with the knowledge and skills needed in the workplace. Others think that the true function of a university should be to give access to knowledge for its own sake, regardless of whether the course is useful to an employer. What, in your opinion, should be the main function of a university? v.5

Some people think that universities should provide graduates with the knowledge and skills needed in the workplace. Others think that the true function of a university should be to give access to knowledge for its own sake, regardless of whether the course is useful to an employer. What, in your opinion, should be the main function of a university? v. 5
As we know that knowledge is power. Generally, it is believed that the educational institutes should include those courses and subjects which are beneficial for the industry. On the other hand, there is also a widely held view that the universities should be teaching in any field of study whether they are useful for the industry or not. In my opinion, I truly believe that institutes should consider the potential need and the requirement of the market while proposing any field of study for two reasons, First, students job security and second to increase literacy rate. To begin with, Universities should start delivering knowledge as per the requirement of the industries, as it would help ease the pathway of employment for new graduates and thus lower the unemployment rate of the country. Furthermore, it will also help to fill the gap between educational institutions and the industries. For example, according to a report in herald, students with the knowledge of industry requirement performs better in their university than those who are unaware of the market needs. On the other hand, when the educational organization put their efforts in knowing the industry need and design their course accordingly, they are truly providing a boost to the literacy rate of any country. Moreover, if everyone find job immediately after graduating from a university, it will not only motivate common people to educate themselves but also improves the literacy rate of the country. For instance, in Canada the literacy rate is 90%, only because they are giving immigration to those people who are well educated and fit for their industry need. To recapitulate, in my opinion, the courses and the subjects of the universities should be designed in such a way that fulfils the need of employer and also help the country to enhance its literacy rate.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
we know that knowledge is power.
Generally
, it
is believed
that the educational institutes should include those courses and subjects which are beneficial for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
.
On the other hand
, there is
also
a
widely
held view that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
should be teaching in any field of study whether they are useful for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
or not. In my opinion, I
truly
believe that institutes should consider the potential need and the requirement of the market while proposing any field of study for two reasons,
First
, students job security and second to increase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
literacy
rate.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Universities
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
delivering knowledge as per the requirement of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
, as it would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
the pathway of employment for new graduates and
thus
lower the unemployment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
Furthermore
, it will
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to fill the gap between educational institutions and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
.
For example
, according to a report in herald, students with the knowledge of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
requirement performs better in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
than those who are unaware of the market needs.

On the other hand
, when the educational organization put their efforts in knowing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
need and design their course
accordingly
, they are
truly
providing a boost to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
literacy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
Moreover
, if everyone
The pronoun 'everyone' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "finds", "found".
find
job immediately after graduating from a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
, it will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
motivate common
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to educate themselves
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
literacy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
For instance
, in Canada the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
literacy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
is 90%,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are giving immigration to those
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who are
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well educated
and fit for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
need.

To recapitulate, in my opinion, the courses and the subjects of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
should
be designed
in such a way that
Possible spelling mistake found.
fulfils
the need of employer and
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
to enhance its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
literacy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
.
16Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
26Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS essay Some people think that universities should provide graduates with the knowledge and skills needed in the workplace. Others think that the true function of a university should be to give access to knowledge for its own sake, regardless of whether the course is useful to an employer. What, in your opinion, should be the main function of a university? v. 5

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
304 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts