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Some people think that universities should provide graduates with the knowledge and skills needed in the workplace. Others think that the true function of a university should be to give access to knowledge for its own sake, regardless of whether the course is useful to an employer. v.14

Some people think that universities should provide graduates with the knowledge and skills needed in the workplace. Others think that the true function of a university should be to give access to knowledge for its own sake, regardless of whether the course is useful to an employer. v. 14
Universities play a vital role in student’s education. There is a general belief that university provides the required ammunition for the students to get on with their career. However, it can also be argued that the university is another business model and should provide knowledge for its benefit. I think a university should service the society by creating better individuals than being money making organisation. The essay will analyse the individual and social benefits created by the university in support of its service to society. Firstly, personality development is of paramount importance to any student. For instance, a student from a reputed university like the University of Technology, Sydney has good exposure to interpersonal skills, soft skills and theoretical knowledge. These skills are vital for students to perform well at the workplace. Additionally, these skills will get campus placements before they can complete their degree. Thus, colleges providing appropriate environment and skill development will result in the production of individuals with the required talent in the professional career. Secondly, society benefits cannot be discounted in the context of university education. Creating individuals with better skills create a healthy society. For example, students completing their medicine degree with better communication and people skills create a society in which all the individuals who go to that doctor will be delighted. If all the people in the community possess the right level of expertise, especially the working professional with the college degree, then the country’s economy will have a positive growth. As you can see, there is a direct correlation between college infrastructure and the society health. In conclusion, university providing quality knowledge and platform for all-round development will aid the individuals and society to benefit out of it. I believe that there will be an increase in the number of students who attend a university that results in the better society.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Universities
play a vital role in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student’s
education. There is a general belief that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
provides the required ammunition for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
on with their career.
However
, it can
also
be argued
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
is another business model and should provide knowledge for its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
benefit
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
should service the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
by creating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
than being money making
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
. The essay will
Possible spelling mistake. 'analyse' is British English.
analyse
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
and social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
benefits
created by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
in support of its service to society.

Firstly
, personality development is of paramount importance to any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
.
For instance
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
from a reputed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
like the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University
of Technology, Sydney has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
exposure to interpersonal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
, soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
and theoretical knowledge. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
are vital for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to perform well at the workplace.
Additionally
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
campus placements
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
they can complete their degree.
Thus
, colleges providing appropriate environment and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
development will result in the production of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
with the required talent in the professional career.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
benefits
cannot
be discounted
in the context of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
education. Creating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
create a healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
completing their medicine degree with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
communication and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
create a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
in which all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
who go to that doctor will
be delighted
. If all the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in the community possess the right level of expertise,
especially
the working professional with the college degree, then the country’s economy will have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
growth. As you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
, there is a direct correlation between college infrastructure and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
health.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
providing quality knowledge and platform for all-round development will aid the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
benefit
out of it. I believe that there will be an increase in the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who attend a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
that results in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
45Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that universities should provide graduates with the knowledge and skills needed in the workplace. Others think that the true function of a university should be to give access to knowledge for its own sake, regardless of whether the course is useful to an employer. v. 14

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
309 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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