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Some people think that the study of history is of little use to us. others believe that studying history helps us to know the present. discuss both viewpoints and give your opinion. v.2

Some people think that the study of history is of little use to us. others believe that studying history helps us to know the present. v. 2
Few persons believe that history subject has not importance as much as other subjects have. Whereas others think that it's a study which helps people to know about the current state. Both the statement must be explained. I think, historical has the same importance like other topics. In an initial statement, people believe that the past is not important because, now a day past cannot be helpful in the career manner. Other subjects like science has more significance than history. Technology has become so advanced that history became the minor subject in the education system. Another scenario explains about the attention of the past in the present time. By taking the inspiration from older days, medical treatment has been developed so well in the form of "Aayurveda", "Suergery" etc. With the help of knowledge of older days, many places have been found like "Lothal" which is situated in Ahmedabad city in Gujarat state. Mythological stories are the best and precious part of Indian past. Indian history is very famous in all over the world. Adults, teenagers must know the Significance of older days, by this, they will value the legacies of India. Many historical places are developed in a country to aware people and give respect to legacy. In conclusion, I would like to give my opinion towards the importance of old stories which plays a significant role in the present life. If history will disappear, that would be the disrespect of Indian legacies. To prevent that problem, priority should be given by people.
Few persons believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
has not importance as much as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
have.
“Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Whereas
others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it's a study which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to know about the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
state. Both the statement
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explained
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
, historical has the same importance
Comparison is written 'the same ... "as"'.
like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
topics.

In an initial statement,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
a day
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
cannot be helpful in the career manner.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
like science has more significance than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
. Technology has become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
advanced that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
became the minor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
in the education system.

Another scenario
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explains
about the attention of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
in the present time. By taking the inspiration from older days, medical treatment has
been developed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
well in the form of
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
Possible spelling mistake found.
Aayurveda
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
,
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
Possible spelling mistake found.
Suergery
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
etc. With the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of knowledge of older days,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
places have
been found
like
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
Possible spelling mistake found.
Lothal
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
which
is situated
in Ahmedabad city in Gujarat state. Mythological stories are the best and precious part of Indian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
. Indian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
in all over the world. Adults,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
know the Significance of older days, by this, they will value the legacies of India.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
historical places
are developed
in a country to aware
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and give respect to legacy.

In conclusion
, I would like to give my opinion towards the importance of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
stories which plays a significant role in the present life. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
Consider removing 'will'. (Usually, 'will' does not occur in a conditional clause, unless in the sense 'want to' or 'be willing to'.)
will disappear
, that would be the disrespect of Indian legacies. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
that problem, priority should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
1Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
20Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that the study of history is of little use to us. others believe that studying history helps us to know the present. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
254 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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