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Some people think that the main purpose of education is to make individuals useful to society while others say education helps them to achieve personal ambitions. Discuss both views and give opinion? v.2

Some people think that the main purpose of education is to make individuals useful to society while others say education helps them to achieve personal ambitions. v. 2
Defining education is difficult, there are different views regarding the topic. Some consider it a requirement to make a person a contributing member of the society and others consider it as a mere tool to achieve personal triumphs. Here, in this essay we will delve into both these views to find out why education is important. A society is comprised of the people who live in it and their thoughts influence the direction of its growth. For instance, a village community which has no basic access to education will not know about the new developments which are happening outside their area. They can get easily exploited by outsiders. Even though their basic day to day activities might carry on, there will not be any greater things achieved through this. Hence, this is one of the main reasons why developing countries like India give high importance to bringing education to its masses by having free schooling for the primary grades. However, being educated has its own perks. As you become aware of what is around you, your ambitions increase accordingly. You will strive to achieve things to earn respect and this in turn will reflect on the social status you and your family. Moreover, when a group of people strive to realize their personal ambitions, it will also help the community they are living in. As the skill level of the people in the area increases, businesses will come in and this will create jobs. For example, Bengaluru is considered as India's silicon valley and a lot of multinational companies have their offices there. This is because of the high density of technical proficient talent available in this location. From a personal point of view, I would say that being educated doesn't necessarily mean University degree. Being educated means you are aware enough to know what happens around you and you are able to understand them and use them to your advantage. A society is part of a country and country is made of what i
Defining
education
is difficult, there are
different
views regarding the topic.
Some
consider it a requirement to
make
a person a contributing member of the society
and others
consider it as a mere tool to achieve personal triumphs. Here, in this essay we will delve into both these views to find out why
education
is
important
.

A society
is comprised of
the
people
who
live
in it and their thoughts influence the direction of its growth.
For instance
, a village community which has no basic access to
education
will not know about the new developments which are happening outside their area. They can
get
easily
exploited by outsiders.
Even though
their basic
day to day
activities might carry on, there will not be any greater things achieved through this.
Hence
, this is one of the main reasons why
developing countries
like India give high importance to bringing
education
to its masses by having free schooling for the primary grades.

However
,
being educated
has its
own
perks. As you become aware of what is around you, your ambitions increase
accordingly
. You will strive to achieve things to earn respect and this in turn will reflect on the social status you and your family.
Moreover
, when a group of
people
strive to realize their personal ambitions, it will
also
help
the community they are living in. As the
skill
level of the
people
in the area increases, businesses will
come
in and this will create jobs.
For example
, Bengaluru
is considered
as India's
silicon valley
and
a lot of
multinational
companies
have their offices there. This is
because
of the high density of technical proficient talent available in this location.

From a personal point of view, I would say that
being educated
doesn't
necessarily
mean University degree.
Being educated
means you are aware
enough
to know what happens around you and you are able to understand them and
use
them to your advantage.

A society is part of a country and country
is made
of what i
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that the main purpose of education is to make individuals useful to society while others say education helps them to achieve personal ambitions. v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
334 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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