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Some people think that the governments of developing countries should introduce new technology to improve the quality of life, while some people believe that the best way is to develop education. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.2

Some people think that the governments of developing countries should introduce new technology to improve the quality of life, while some people believe that the best way is to develop education. v. 2
It is true that technological advances can make people’s life easier, and is suggested to be introduced in less developed counties. Others, however, argue that education is the fundamental means for promoting a positive development. On the one hand, it is widely held notion that technological innovations bring a couple of benefits to people. For one thing, with the advert of the telecommunication and the Internet, they are able to work from home, who can lower the cost of travel, save time for commuting forth and back and rather gain more spare times, thereby achieving work-life balance. For another, citizens’ life expectancy can be raised owing to developments in the medical technology. For instance, a number of new drugs and innovative medical devices can cure previously incurable diseases and greatly increase surgery success rate within the bounds of possibility. On the other hand, education holds a key in one’s job prospects as high literacy and a range of skills boost their employability and living standards. To more specific, technical courses assist learners getting rid of poverty by acquiring practical skills in a trade, such as car mechanics. Subjects like graphic design and accounting place importance on job skills, while medicine and nursing impart professional skills. For those are educated and highly skilled, they are more competitive in job hunting and acquire wider lucrative employment opportunities, thereby improving living standards with a decent pay. In conclusion, personally, I am of the opinion that education is of essential importance for a person’s promising future, especially for the deprived one. Yet, the advent of technology not only provides people with convenience, but also can assist them in learning. Online courses or distant learning courses, for example, can allow adult workers to study part-time.
It is true that technological advances can
make
people
’s life easier, and
is suggested
to
be introduced
in less developed counties. Others,
however
, argue that education is the fundamental means for promoting a
positive
development.

On the one hand, it is
widely
held notion that technological innovations bring a couple of benefits to
people
. For one thing, with the advert of the telecommunication and the Internet, they are able to work from home, who can lower the cost of travel, save time for commuting forth and back and
rather
gain more spare times, thereby achieving work-life balance. For another, citizens’ life expectancy can
be raised
owing to developments in the medical technology.
For
instance, a number of new drugs and innovative medical devices can cure previously incurable diseases and
greatly
increase surgery success rate within the bounds of possibility.

On the other hand
, education holds a key in one’s job prospects as high literacy and a range of
skills
boost their employability and living standards. To more specific, technical courses assist learners getting rid of poverty by acquiring practical
skills
in a trade, such as car mechanics. Subjects like graphic design and accounting place importance on job
skills
, while medicine and nursing impart professional
skills
. For those
are educated
and
highly
skilled, they are more competitive in job hunting and acquire wider lucrative employment opportunities, thereby improving living standards with a decent pay.

In conclusion
,
personally
, I am of the opinion that education is of essential importance for a person’s promising future,
especially
for the deprived one.
Yet
, the advent of technology not
only
provides
people
with convenience,
but
also
can assist them in learning. Online courses or distant learning courses,
for example
, can
allow
adult workers to study part-time.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that the governments of developing countries should introduce new technology to improve the quality of life, while some people believe that the best way is to develop education. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
290 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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