Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people think that the governments of developing countries should introduce new technology to improve the quality of life, while some people believe that the best way is to develop education. Discuss both views and give your opinion v.1

Some people think that the governments of developing countries should introduce new technology to improve the quality of life, while some people believe that the best way is to develop education. 1
There are arguments about whether the government of developing countries should introduce new technology to improve the quality of life or to develop education. This essay will discuss both views. To begin with, technology play a vital role in the way people live. Life is much more convenient with the help of technology, so many jobs that require manual labour can be done with some devices. For instance, domestic chores such as washing of clothes and dishes are now carried out with washing machine and dish washer. The result of this is that time and energy are save so that people can concentrate on other aspect of their lives. More so, many companies in the developed countries use machines to achieve lots of tasks that humans take so much time to accomplish. There is no doubt that technology is key in the improvement of life. On the other hand, I am of the opinion that education is the best way to improve the quality of life of a nation. So many developing countries are underdeveloped because they fail to improve their educational system, which in turn affect every other sector adversely. Lack of education can make a population of people fail to embrace technology and other innovations. For example, a particular group of people in some part of Africa rejected polio vaccine even when this disease affected a large number of children in that terrain, this is mainly due to ignorance of the causes and management of the illness. The impact of poor education is very grave as it not only lead to technological stagnation but can claim lives. In conclusion, even though technology is very important in making peoples lives better, good education is the best way to improve their lives.
There are arguments about whether the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
should introduce new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
the quality of life or to develop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. This essay will discuss both views.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
play a vital role in the way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
. Life is much more convenient with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
jobs that require manual
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
can
be done
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
devices.
For instance
, domestic chores such as washing of clothes and dishes are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
carried out with washing machine and dish washer. The result of this is that time and energy are
The word "save" is a verb. Did you mean the adjective "safe"?
save
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can concentrate on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
aspect of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
. More
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
machines to achieve lots of tasks that humans take
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much time to accomplish. There is no doubt that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is key in the improvement of life.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, I am of the opinion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is the best way to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
the quality of life of a nation.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
are underdeveloped
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they fail to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
their educational system, which in turn affect every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
sector
adversely
. Lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a population of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
fail to embrace
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
innovations.
For example
, a particular group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
part of Africa rejected polio vaccine even when this disease
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
a large number of
children in that terrain, this is
mainly
due to ignorance of the causes and management of the illness. The impact of poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
grave as it not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
lead to technological stagnation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
can claim
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.

In conclusion
,
even though
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
in making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
peoples
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
better,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is the best way to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
28Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that the governments of developing countries should introduce new technology to improve the quality of life, while some people believe that the best way is to develop education. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
292 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts