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Some people think that success in education depends on the teacher while others believe its the student s attitude that matters Discuss both views and give your opinion write no less than 250 words v.2

Some people think that success in education depends on the teacher while others believe its the student s attitude that matters 2
Education plays an important role in a life of every individual. While a group of people opines that victory in studies rely on the approach of the student, but the remaining believe it is in the hands of the teacher. In my opinion, I agree that the success definitely depends upon the student’s diligence, however, in some cases teacher also plays an essential role. To start with, there are various reasons why a student is responsible for their achievement. When somebody wants to achieve high marks, it can be obtained through perseverance irrespective of the school or teaching staff. For example, in India, there are many government school going children who got outstanding scores in the secondary final exam. Also, even in private school if the student does not have fascination towards studies, then it is impossible to succeed in education. Therefore, the compulsion of the student is crucial. On the other hand, many teachers have lighted lamp in the life of their students. Not only education but also obedience, confidence are some of the necessary characters taught by the tutor. Also when a student is impoverished, there are mentors who spent their own money to satisfy the need of the corresponding youngster. To clarify any kind of questions either personally or in the subject, the first person who comes to the mind of an youth is class master. To sum up, from my point of view education of the student is admittedly determined by his behavior and mentality. Though, sincere teachers always play an imperative part in the life of every student.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Education
plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in a life of every individual. While a group of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
opines that victory in studies rely on the approach of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the remaining
The word 'believe' is a verb. Did you mean the noun "belief"?
believe
it is in the hands of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
. In my opinion, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the success definitely depends upon the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student’s
diligence,
however
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "cases'" or "case's"?
cases
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher
also
plays an essential role.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, there are various reasons why a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
is responsible for their achievement. When somebody wants to achieve high marks, it can
be obtained
through perseverance irrespective of the school or teaching staff.
For example
, in India, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
school going children who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
outstanding scores in the secondary final exam.
Also
, even in private school if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
does not have fascination towards studies, then it is impossible to succeed in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
Therefore
, the compulsion of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
is crucial.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
have lighted lamp in the life of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
obedience, confidence are
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
necessary characters taught by the tutor.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
when a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
is impoverished
, there are mentors who spent their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
money to satisfy the need of the corresponding youngster. To clarify any kind of questions either
personally
or in the subject, the
first
person who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to the mind of
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
youth is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
master.

To sum up, from my point of view
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
is
admittedly
determined by his behavior and mentality.
“Though” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Though
, sincere
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
always play an imperative part in the life of every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes
Language is to the mind more than light is to the eye.
William Gibson

IELTS essay Some people think that success in education depends on the teacher while others believe its the student s attitude that matters 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
263 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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