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Nowadays culture is different is some ways compare to the past. Do you think the culture development has a positive or negative trend. v.2

Nowadays culture is different is some ways compare to the past. Do you think the culture development has a positive or negative trend. v. 2
It is undoubtedly clear, that there are vast changes in culture over a few decades. While there are some beneficial factors due to this trend, there are also significant drawbacks. On the one hand, there are several benefits because of the change in culture. First, people are updated on the recent trend, which helps them to move along with the fast world and makes their life uncomplicated. Second, it also saves an individual from the inferiority complex. As an example, when everyone around a person is in modern values, it will automatically force him to feel lowliness if he is not updated. Third, it is always stunning to have the different exposure rather the always following the same method, especially, youth want to try different things in every aspect. On the other hand, modern culture creates substantial problems too. One problem is that citizens may forgot to preserves their own culture, tradition, and customs followed by the ancestors leading to an example for the future generation. Sometimes, there are also chances for the extinction of many rituals and practices. Another problem is the extravagance, the upgrade in culture plays a vital role among youngsters. For example, teenagers are more addicted to the plethora of awful habits like excessive smoking, boozing etc. , moreover, to an extent where they are not even to ready listen to their parents. To conclude, changes are inevitable everywhere and culture is no exception. I feel that there is nothing wrong in accepting the modern culture, as far as, we are within our limit. Furthermore, it is responsible of every individual to not forget his or her own customs and followings.
It is
undoubtedly
clear
, that there are vast
changes
in
culture
over a few decades. While there are
some
beneficial factors due to this trend, there are
also
significant drawbacks.

On the one hand, there are several benefits
because
of the
change
in
culture
.
First
,
people
are updated
on the recent trend, which
helps
them to
move
along with the
fast
world and
makes
their life uncomplicated. Second, it
also
saves an individual from the inferiority complex. As an example, when everyone around a person is in modern values, it will
automatically
force him to feel lowliness if he is not updated. Third, it is always stunning to have the
different
exposure
rather
the always following the same method,
especially
, youth want to try
different
things in every aspect.

On the other hand
, modern
culture
creates substantial problems too. One problem is that citizens may forgot to
preserves
their
own
culture
, tradition, and customs followed by the ancestors leading to an example for the future generation.
Sometimes
, there are
also
chances for the extinction of
many
rituals and practices. Another problem is the extravagance, the upgrade in
culture
plays a vital role among youngsters.
For example
,
teenagers
are more addicted to the plethora of awful habits like excessive smoking, boozing etc.
,
moreover
, to an extent where they are not even to ready listen to their parents.

To conclude
,
changes
are inevitable everywhere and
culture
is no exception. I feel that there is nothing
wrong
in accepting the modern
culture
, as far as, we are within our limit.
Furthermore
, it is
responsible of
every individual to not forget
his or her
own
customs and followings.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
I am always sorry when any language is lost, because languages are the pedigrees of nations.
Samuel Johnson

IELTS essay Nowadays culture is different is some ways compare to the past. Do you think the culture development has a positive or negative trend. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
275 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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