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Some people think that students who do not take a break in studies between the high school and the university are at disadvantage compared to students that travel and work after high school before furthering their education. v.2

Some people think that students who do not take a break in studies between the high school and the university are at disadvantage compared to students that travel and work after high school before furthering their education. v. 2
Universities provide lofty education to their students under the supervision of trained professionals. However, they lack in providing practical experience of the subject to students. Some people argue that continuation of studies without break is less fruitful. Students should travel across the world to mitigate their stress and involve themselves into practical work in order to deepen the understanding of the studies they had learnt at universities. I believe that study break is an opportunity for people to enhance their skills by implementing their concept in the real world. Practical experience plays a pivotal role in grasping difficult concepts with ease. By tightening the grip of a subject, one can become a master of it. Therefore, it is an essential part of learning to indulge yourself in a practical field after completing high school studies. It will equally beneficial for your knowledge and pocket. Students without study breaks for travelling or part-time jobs are less likely to perform well in their professional lives. As they do not have practical working knowledge of things that deterrent their growth in the market, gradually they overcome their problem after having exposure to practical working. Moreover, they also lack behind in other qualities such as teamwork, confidence etc. To sum up, I would like to say that learning by doing is the most effective technique that is commonly used by successful people. Therefore, universities should make it mandatory for their students to have practical knowledge of the subject before entering into university. Study without break could cause anxiety and stress and is less effective for young learners.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Universities
provide lofty education to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
under the supervision of trained professionals.
However
, they lack in providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
experience of the subject to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
argue that continuation of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
break
is less fruitful.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
should travel across the world to mitigate their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and involve themselves into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
work in order to deepen the understanding of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
they had
Possible spelling mistake. 'learnt' is British English.
learnt at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
. I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
break
is an opportunity for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to enhance their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
by implementing their concept in the real world.

Practical experience plays a pivotal role in grasping difficult concepts with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
. By tightening the grip of a subject, one can become a master of it.
Therefore
, it is an essential part of learning to indulge yourself in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
field after completing high school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
. It will
equally
beneficial for your knowledge and pocket.

Students without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
breaks
for travelling or part-time jobs are less likely to perform well in their professional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. As they do not have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
working knowledge of things that deterrent their growth in the market,
gradually
they overcome their problem after having exposure to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
working.
Moreover
, they
also
lack behind in other qualities such as teamwork, confidence etc.

To sum up, I would like to say that learning by doing is the most effective technique
that is
commonly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by successful
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it mandatory for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
practical
knowledge of the subject
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
entering into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Study
without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
break
could cause anxiety and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and is less effective for young learners.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
24Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that students who do not take a break in studies between the high school and the university are at disadvantage compared to students that travel and work after high school before furthering their education. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
263 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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